brokenpromises.

Eclispe

2010-07-01T09:17:00.003+08:00

Yelaaaa, Eclispe out and all the girls is rattling about how happy they are watching it with their boyfriends! -.- Yelaaaaa, your boyfriend very sweet book for you guys! -.- Yelaaaaaaa, you guys are the earlybirds! -.- YES, I KNOW YOU HAVE BOYFRIEND! >:| GRRRR

Nabeh. No need to action what! Tell the whole world. >:|

Eh Pretty Little Liars, I wanna watch with you guys cannnnn? Pretty please. *Puss in boots eyes*

Hmph! You guys can watch with your boyfriends! I have my darlings to watch with. Bluek!

2010-06-19T20:45:00.002+08:00

It's been months since this song have been aired. Thousands of videos had been uploaded. And its only now, I decide to view one of the videos. Its a nice song by the way. I preferred the original one though. But all is nice. Awww ):

2010-06-12T22:23:00.005+08:00

Here comes the part where I have to be strong during at my lowest state. I thought all those obstacles in the past I had faced was the worst thing ever in my life. I was obviously wrong. As of this moment, my confidence is so low, I think I can jump off any high building at any point of time.

I can no longer deal with all these. Everything is pulling me down. Pulling me so low, that I can't even get myself up. It's a test from Him and I have to be strong. But I don't think its possible.

At times, I did question His power, doubting what islamics view on Him. Astaghfirullah al azim. Mengucap dian.

I just have alot in mind. Like me having to stay in JB for a period of time. And now I have to move again to another place just when I am getting used to this house. I have to think about my social life. I can't really spend much time in Singapore due to this. My mum is transferring to KL permanently which means she will be staying there and I would probably get to see her during holidays. I hope this would not happen and her boss would find someone else. I have a relationship to think about. It's not really about him but more to me. All this thing that's happening to me, I just throw my anger to him. I know I hurt him alot with my attitude at times. He have alot to put up with me. I cried to myself alot this year, especially after I moved here. And I hate myself for that. I don't know where is that cold, hard hearted girl who rarely cries at all. I don't know where's the happy go lucky girl who is strong enough to face anything. Haiz. My head hurts alot nowadays. I don't know why. I hope nothing serious to worry about.

Can I just have my old life back? That's all I'm asking for.

2010-06-10T22:09:00.003+08:00

Today I went to Singapore with an intention of going to the Silat. But early in the morning already, someone just can't stop blabbering of how she's gonna be alone and such. Well, I just pretend I don't hear anything. It became ultimately annoying when she keep saying it till lunch time. Would any of you guys still take it as a joke if it was you? Well, I don't. So, although no matter how much I wanted to go Silat, I just had this thoughts on her. I know if I go, I'll have to face the consequences later. Well, of course, she's my MUM. I've known her for my whole life, I know how she's like. So, from her reactions, I know she really was heavy hearted to let me go silat although she didn't say it directly. Please la, 18 years with her. I know what's her every single movement. So, yes I went to her office to accompany her but of course with a sullen face. I just went in without acknowledging her, just so she knows this time Im not giving in. Its a little too many times of me being mad at her, in fact, every single day I had something that Im unhappy about her; whether it was her actions or her words or anything. But little did I know, I went a little too far-fetched this time. Not that I intended to do it, it just a sudden reaction. I scream at her. Yes, I did. Maybe, I can't stand the pain I've kept in for my whole life. We had fights occasionally and sometimes its a huge fight, but never once did I ever scream at her. Because my dad taught me that I should always just keep quiet and I've been doing it well till now. She called dad and complained to him, but of course its a lie. So, to defend myself, I screamed at her. Dad was on my side, as always. Because him and me, we always faced this situations. I don't even have a sense of regret, even right now. I feel good. For the first time, I let all my anger out. I told her what Im not happy about. The weird thing is, she seems calm. She didn't scream like she always did. Im still wondering about that. Maybe she was shocked. Well, apparently, I cried. For the third time infront of her. Yes, I would never cry infront of her unless I can't take it anymore. And this time, I cried real bad. I am not myself today. And although this may sound harsh or cruel, but I think she deserves it. She should know that we suffered because of her and nobody fight for themselves because they scared of her. Well, I used to be one of them, but now, not anymore. Im not going to keep quiet anymore. Im going to fight for my own happiness. And she should know that.

I felt bad for him. I am ashamed of him. I know its not nice giving this attitude and left an impression of anyone. People might think Im an unfilial child. But I really hope he would understand me. Im not myself today. And I am disappointed of myself. Disappointed that I had to sacrifice his happiness for my mum. Yes, I know mum is always the priority. But maybe, just maybe, for once she should give me a chance to make others happy. And I know how her words always make people think she's the right one. How she twisted her words, are so.. cruel. Yes, she did give me the greenlight, but me as her child, would know how she's sincere in letting me doing something. And today, she's not. She may say its a joke, but maybe today, it was a little too much. You know that feeling when someone keeps bugging you for hours, and tried to brainwash you, tried to bribe you and stuff? Maybe for a few minutes, it may seems like a joke. But it was continuously, I don't think so. Before anyone of you wanted to say maybe Im wrong. Get this facts right, she's MY mum. I know her well enough to detect her sincerity. Back to what Im saying earlier, I just wanted to apologise to him for ruining the day. Im sorry if "we" let you be involved in this matter. Im sorry Im not heeding your advises. And Im sorry, that your girlfriend acted like this today. Im truly sorry sweetheart.

At the end of the day, me and mum parted ways. Wasting my time wasn't it? But no, Im not going to give in. I walked away from her although I was thinking how am I going home at that point of time. I almost took the train but dad saved the day. He called me and tell me to stay right where I am, and he'll come and get me. Dad, always the saviour of my life when she's the caused of all the unhappiness. He understands me. Although, we didn't really talk with each other and such, but we shared this secret bond together. Anyways, he came and it was early. For the first time, he reached this early to Singapore. However, I didn't know he came to get her as well. I had to stuck in the car with her throughout the journey. I know dad is looking for an opportunity to force me, yet again for a thousand times, to apologise to her. I know I should. Im a child and she's a mum. But not today. For the first time, I didn't even open my mouth to say a word of sorry. Im not going to give in. Maybe I will, but it'll take awhile; if she's willing to wait. I need time. Im not strong nowadays, and having another problem adding up my misery, how am I supposed to get up fast?

Though my day was a really bad one today. I did have a fair share of happiness with my sweetheart in the morning. Thankyou for that period of time of being with me although it was a short one. Thankyou for coming down all the way to tpy early in the morning. I know you're trying your best to improve, I shall say I am impressed with you. I appreciate all these things. Thank you so much dear. I love you. And a stranger managed to make me feel amused. So I was walking on a pavement on the way meeting my dad when a little girl ran to me from behind. I was shocked for a second. Well of course, my guess was right. Her brother asked for my number. HAHAHA. Always the same story when a little girl appeared on the scene. Been there done that few times before. BUT I look at the girl, smiled and said sorry and I walked away; without even looking behind to see the guy. See sweetheart, I don't flirt and I don't notty2 or whatsoever. I loyal to you okay. Cheyy, hmph! Hehe. But that small part sort of made me smile too. Why not. I was in my worst state, with a face that didn't even have any make-up and a face that just got over from crying, I think I looked damn bad. K thats not the point. Im still not happy.

2010-06-08T20:09:00.002+08:00

Finally, I’ve taken my photo and drop off my form at the ICA building. I’m gonna have a new passport with a new photo. Yay! But this new picture still cacat la. But better than my current one. HAHA.

Anyway, wanna say thanks to my sweetheart for accompanying me there. Once we dropped off the form, we met with his aunty for lunch. Thanks to her for treating us lunch. Hehehe.

So after lunch, took bus with them and dropped off at bedok inter. Again, I was alone. So, trying to fill the time up, I took 25 to Ang Mo Kio and went to the library. I forgot it was raining so the library was packed. And to avoid being in the library for long, I just grabbed a book, borrowed it and went out of the library.

Took bus to mum’s workplace and sat under the void deck for quite a while filling my time with the book.

I know some people would be surprised seeing me being alone. What a loner. I am so used to having people around me, and never go places alone. And to see myself being a loner now, tsktsk. I guess I’ve changed. Yes guys, Im not the girl who depend on friends and people to go anywhere. Im independent now. Not that I like it, but I guess, I’ll have to adapt this.

Anyhoos, I think Im not going to Singapore till school starts. I don’t see the need of going there. I would rather stay at home than walking around alone. Haha. :D

Toodles.

Oh, have you rp students checked your grades? Damn, mine’s E for Sociology, as expected. HAHA

♥♥♥

2010-06-07T23:00:00.002+08:00

I had an awesome day with my boyfriend today! It wasn't a date, but we spent the day with just the two of us. Morning did not really went that well since we were not in good terms the day before but by afternoon, everything's all fine and I had the best time of my life with him. (:

We didn't do much. More of like hanging out. But I am happy enough. Hees.

Thank you sayang for the day. I appreciate your presence by my side even when we did nothing much. And you know I love you right. ♥

And I hope your idea works this time round. Honestly, I think its a good idea too! :D

2010-06-06T21:49:00.003+08:00

Manage to go Singapore and catch the Silat finals. Congrats to all who wins and never give up to those who didn't manage to clinch the gold medal. You guys did well. (:

I get to meet some familiar faces over there. Met Azhar, friend sister and Fithri! And also my opponent that I lost to when I was in PSK years ago. Fithri was a jury. Omgosh. Haha. And I miss her lots (: Great to see all the silat people. And Azhar didn't seem happy to meet me. I think I know why although I hope its not true. Hmm.

So after silat, they wanted to have lunch/dinner together. I wasn't really looking forward to it since I didn't know most of them. Well, of course I know their names and saw them couple of times. But we're nothing more than merely strangers.

But of course, boyf really seems to be looking forward for it and what can I say right. Although I did say I did not want to go, I have to right. And whats worse when I know the place was the place that I really hated. Simpang bedok. -.- I didn't know where it was till we reached the place and I can't possibly go home right.

Simpang bedok, even my parents didn't even dare to bring me there unless they want to see me throw tantrums. Well, I should make it clear to you guys that I HATE crowded places. I don't why but I just hate it. And when Im in that situation, you guys can expect my mood swing right away.

And I think, my friends should know that. Since I refused to walk in the middle of the canteen in school during peak hours, I was hesitant to walk in front of the canteen, I preferred eating at the corner. Didn't any of this make sense? And I think I stated clearly in my blog "About me" section. Haizzz.

And the most disappointing thing ever? Someone who knows me for half a year already didn't know this basic thing. Sorry for the bad attitude I've thrown to you and your friends.

Well, I can't really stand it and there it was, an opportunity for me to get out from there when he decided to go for a smoke. Told him I wanna go home and he sent me to the bus stop. And right there and then, he finally knows the reason.
The minute the bus came, he have a choice. And he chooses to be with them. Well, actually he have a choice to make the minute he knows my reason. But I can't see him doing anything except apologising. Well, okay then. (:

So yeah, I told you not to take the bus with me. I told you I wanna go home. But haha, the reason I want to go home is because I didn't want to be in the crowded places. Not because I didn't wanna spend time with you. You would have known that.

Well, this time, Im really utterly disappointed with you. Please do make a choice. Do you really need a girlfriend in your life?

I believed you have said that actions are more than words. Then, why each time you cheered me up is just through words? You apologised to me, you text me saying you love me. All the same each time we fight. But guess what? You failed the minute you left your bag on the chair and walk away once I boarded the bus.

Stop lying to yourself. Asked yourself. Do you really need a girlfriend in your life? You said you wanna spend time alone with me after eating. Then why do I not see you spending time with me after I left the table? Because you left your bag behind? Or because you have your friends there.

And guess what? I was damn hungry at that point of time. But I think only the people who knows me well enough would know that I wouldn't touch a single food in Simpang Bedok or rather, a crowded places. I lied. And you can't even catch the signs of me lying. You asked several times and that was it. That's it. You know what I always did when you refused to eat. I forced till you eat.

I don't expect any apologize from you. Not a word of it. What I need is an answer. A choice for you to make. Do you really need a girlfriend in your life?

___________________________________________________________

Tomorrow I need to accompany my mum to work just because she need to go work alone since dad can't send her. There's a class bbq but I don't think I'm gonna attend. Sorry guys! Now I shall plan what I'm gonna do. Urgh. Probably sat stoning under the block or library. -.- HAHA. K bye.

:D

2010-06-05T22:35:00.005+08:00

My morning did not really went that well. I was damn pissed off that I was left behind in Malaysia. I thought my mum would wake me up and she thought I would set alarm for myself. So, I didn't wake up. -..-

My mum then tried to cheer me up and she decided to watch movie. We checked on the internet and we chose Lagenda Budak Setan. Thought it was gonna be a bore, but no its not. In fact, I give it a 8.9/10 rating. Totally a must watch! :D

I almost cried watching it. Almost only! HEHEHE.

Before the movie start, we had our brunch. We had macdonald since that was the only food place available there. Kental right, I know. HAHA.

The malaysia cinema not bad y'knw. Cheap and the seats are just fine. But one problem. This one really cannot angkat. They bring small kids and they are so damn noisy but the parents didn't do anything bout it. Bodoh betol. And another problem is, I don't know if there's such rule or not here, but I think the people here got no common sense to actually silence their phone. -..-

Okay, so once the move was over, we had a little mini shopping. Then, called dad to pick us up since he's home. But he got sesat and we end up taking taxi home.

Then put our stuffs and out again for dinner. We had KFC. Ermmm, this one.. because we wanted to try the black pepper chicken flavour. Damn nice I tell you.

Today damn shiok eh. Mac la, KFC la. Dearest is so gonna be angry with me. Sorry syg! hees. :p

So my day turned out well. Im a happy kiddo. :D

A pig finally had fly?

2010-06-04T21:59:00.002+08:00

I think today, a pig had fly! :D

Tell me when can I see my dear sweetheart wrote such a sweet note to me in facebook. I am so exhilarated that I just had to blog this NOW. I want to cry already. But cry of joy la ofcourse! Awwww (': sweetness. My heart is doing bungee jumping right now. Hahaha!

I love you sweetheaaaaaaaaaaaart!!!!!!! :D

2010-06-03T21:45:00.003+08:00

Almost a week of holiday is gone! And its already 3rd of June. THIRD!!! FIVE more days till the due date of my PP. And I've still not done anything! Sucks big time. The thing is, I don't know what to do! What am I gonna type in Microsoft Words of 1500 WORDS of a STADIUM?!!!

So, apparently, my UT2 for Sports facilities management, Im supposed to do a PP. Wth right?! And the problem is that I've to choose stadiums in Singapore that are best suitable to the FIFA needs. Macam paham only! But I've chosen 2 and I'm not sure if it was the right choice. And I only went that far. I can't bear going further because I'm just clueless. Oh please someone help me.

I need someone who's really into FIFA thingy. -.- Ahh, my boypren!!! HAHA. I shall ask for his help. :p

Dear boyf, please help your syg here. Pretty pleeeeease! )':

K, let's not get panic. Actually, I should. FIVE more days, HELLO! Ni la, ade time, hegeh2. Skarang nak dekat due date baru panic. Ish3, dian dian.

Oh well, forget that for a second. Let's talk about something happy. It's already half year of knowing my boyfriend. I know, macam whats the big deal gitu kan. But hello, dah half a year okay. And we're still strong. Although hari2 gadoh and there are times, one of us feel like giving up, well, here we are, still as one. (': Awwww, we are beautiful couple. Huahuahua.

K, I know my blog now is like filled with me and boyfriend's life. We gadoh, we happy, we in love, blablabla, confirm ade terselit in every blog post. But haha, you guys don't mind right? Come on, it's time I let the world know that I have a boyfriend and post something about my love life. That's okay right? (:

Anyway anyway, finally Umar joined silat! HAHAHA. I want to laugh already. Last time force him to join silat, alot of excuses. Tuptup, join jugaaaak. :p Oh well, now that I got someone I know who joined silat, I have no reasons to say no kan? So hmmm, considering considering. (;

Ahh, okay la. Bye. :D

Cat performs CPR on his girlfriend after getting hit by a car

2010-06-02T11:52:00.002+08:00

Beautiful )':

2010-06-01T23:00:00.003+08:00

It started off with a mundane Tuesday morning.
Lets fastforward to 9AM.
Took train from tpy to woodlands just to go library.
Why woodlands?!
Because I took train at 9.30 and the timing is just right for the library to open up.
Guess what? I reached ON TIME.
Good thing? NOT.
The library is full. As in, the tables.
*^@$(*@^&$((!!!!!!
Oh before that, in the train, I disturb my sayang.
HEHEHE. Kesian dierrr..
So once I reached the woodlands platform, I made up my mind to go bedok.
I think all of you guys would get the hint that my intention going there was to meet my baby.
So, there I go trained down to bedok.
Reached bedok, Ahah! this is where the climax of the story finally comes in.
I quarrelled with him. -.-
So, it was.. ermm, more of like something to do with our reactions and egos.
Well, hahaha. I merajok, go back to tpy. -.-
Fyi, we didn't get to meet.
And apparently, I just had to take 168 all the way to woodlands just so that I could make up the time.
And again, from woodlands, I took the train to tpy.
Keje bodoh la aku ni. HAHAHA.
Somehow, we are on the verge of going on separate ways again.
This time, its my decisions.
But I asked his opinion, at least, and then we talked things out.
So I found out that it wasn't really his fault.
But what he was trying to do was just so sweet.
Just that his sweetness didn't really happen.
Talk things out..
And we finally meet in tpy.
He came down to tpy. This tickles my heart.
HAHA.
Well, we end up having a good time together.
I get to meet my sayang.
I get to spend time with him.
Best. I love today. ♥

A date with sweetheart ♥

2010-05-31T22:02:00.003+08:00

31 May 2010, definitely a special date for me. Finally, after almost half a year, I finally had a real date with my boyfriend. (:

It doesn't started out well since we had a fight the night before, as always. Haha. But we're fine after that, as always. So we end up watching Shrek Happily Ever After 3D since The Last Song was only in the morning. It was okaaaay. A cute cute love story. heh!

Afterwhich, we decided to have lunch only to get a message from my mum wanting me to buy mascara and eyeliner. -.- And I didn't really have enough money with me.

We end up going bedok and my boyf only ate the nachos we bought. Awww, sorry syg! Oh well, it wasn't really a perfect date to start or end with but it works for me. At least, finally I got to spend a day with him, only him.

However, we didn't really spend that long since my sweetheart is sick. I forced him to go home and have a good rest.

Dear sweetheart,

You make me the most happiest girl on Earth today. ♥

2010-05-31T00:40:00.002+08:00

Apparently, Im so used to going out with plans ready right before my eyes. Im so used to guys planning out dates and bring me wherever they planned to. I end up happy. Im not a planner. Really, Im not. And I hate it when someone wants me to plan it out. Don't matter if I went out as groups or as a couple or what, I just don't plan. Ever wonder why I don't go out alone? Because I don't plan. Get it?

5 things your girlfriend won't tell you

2010-05-30T22:54:00.002+08:00

1. We like the chase – you chasing us.
Yep, it’s sad but true that when a guy is too eager to catch us we wonder why. What is wrong with this guy? Why is he so clingy? Is he a control freak? Is he a serial dater? A player with many girlfriends on the go? Is he insane? It’s not that we don’t want to be caught, we do, we just don’t want to feel trapped and when things happen too fast trapped is how we feel. We need to be sure of our feelings and of our attraction before we can step off the racetrack and give up the chase. You need to woo us to make us yours. Some guys lay out traps, saying all the right things and meaning none of them, in an attempt to woo us and this gives way to our biggest fear; falling prey to an insincere guy who is more about the game than being in a relationship. For this reason even once we’re yours, even once we are sure of your feelings and you are sure of ours, we need to still feel a little bit of the chase. When you chase us we feel like you want us and are willing to do some work to be with us and we don’t want that feeling to go away just because you’ve caught us.

2. When we say we’re “OK” or that things are “fine” the opposite is probably true.
Girls are communicators. It is hardwired in to our psyches to talk and talk and talk some more whenever there is discord or conflict. So if you sense there’s a problem and gather the courage to ask us and we respond with a “fine” or “it’s ok” or some other sentence with less than 7 (short) words chances are good that we really want to talk. So, you think, what’s a guy to do? You ask a question, you get an answer, and you plan based on that answer. Who wants to read between the lines or guess what is really going on? What a waste of time, right? Wrong! When girls pull the short answers out during a conversation it is because we want you to put the effort in to getting us to open up. It comes from a place of feeling like you don’t usually care what we have to say so we want you to put some effort in to getting us to talk so we can be sure we will be listened to. Now those perceptive guys among you may have your hands up right now waiting to ask the obvious question… if a girl feels like she’s not usually heard isn’t that the REAL problem? Yes, yes it is, and one little talk won’t stop that feeling of being marginalized. In psychology we call this a learned response, a behavior that does not come naturally but rather has been developed through a process called social conditioning. You may very well be the most attentive boyfriend since the dawn of time but if her previous guys made her feel insignificant or unheard you’ll have to help her carry that baggage. Heck, you’ll have to help her unpack it and put it away! So when your girl replies with a curt little answer to your questions don’t take her at face value. Calmly and gently ask her a few more times. Once she feels like you will hear her nature will take over and, voila! You’ll be communicating.

3. We want you to have your guy time.
It is such a myth that girls don’t like to let their guy just hang with the boys. It's a terrible lie perpetrated by relationship-phobes throughout the ages. It is totally untrue that we want you to give up your life to be with us. Think of it this way… when we met you and fell for you, you were (hopefully) single and your friends were a big part of your life. Take your friends away and a big piece of the guy we fell for goes with them. So we want you to keep your guy time. We know you need your friends and truth be told we need our friends too. That being said, obviously when you are single you have lots of spare time to spend with friends but when you are in a relationship some of that time is going to be taken up by your significant other (A.K.A. us). That is only normal. It is normal for you to need your guy time and it is normal for you to want to spend time with us. If you find the right balance the guy-time issue quickly becomes a non-issue. It is when we feel like you don’t make as much time for us as you do for them or that you resent being away from your friends when you are with us that the stereotypical “girlfriend verses the friends” scenario takes the stage. It’s all about balance. Spending time with your friends or with us will never be an issue as long as there is a balance and as long as we never feel that they mean more to you than we do or that they come always first.

4. We want to know your friends but aren’t so sure you need to know ours.
I’m not going to lie; this is hypocrisy in its most raw form. We want you to bring us around your friends, we want to know them and we want them to like us, but we aren’t quite as crazy about you knowing our friends. The why of this is as simple as it is irrational and here it is… we want to know your boys so we can understand the kinds of things they may get you to do when we’re not around. In short, will they encourage you to cheat on us, will they get you doing reckless and dangerous things, and will they help you engage in self-destructive activities? What we want to know is if they will be good or bad influences on you. We also want to create a buffer; we want your friends to like us so that they won’t want you to lose us. If there is no tension between your friends and us then we don’t need to fear them asking you to choose between love and friendship. Now on the flip side, we don’t really want you getting all chummy with our friends because we don’t want them to fill you in on all of our dirty little secrets. As previously noted girls are talkers by nature and we don’t want them to let something slip that may make you raise an eyebrow in our direction. We also fear, but will never admit fearing, you wanting one of our friends more than you want us. It’s bad enough to lose your guy to another girl but when that girl was once a friend, well, the sting is even sharper. So allow us this hypocrisy. It’s irrational, that's true, but it’s also quite harmless.

5. We worry that other girls look better now that you are in a relationship.
Mike nailed the core of every girlfriend's relationship insecurity on the head when he brought up the GIGS (Grass Is Greener Syndrome). The idea that life is better on the other side is one of the most destructive forces in relationship world and girls feel that guys fall for it way too often. It is a great fear of ours that once you can’t have other girls you will suddenly want them all. It leads to a lot of unfounded jealousy brought on by innocent comments on your part or casual non-flirtatious conversations with other girls. So what’s a guy to do? In a perfect world you’d stop interacting with other girls altogether but our rational super-ego knows that’s not realistic. What you need to do is follow these three simple rules; 1) never pay more attention to another girl than you do to your girlfriend, 2) never comment over and over how hot/cool/nice/fun another girl is, and 3) if you meet a great girl while you’re in a relationship hook her up with one of your buddies (also known as taking her off the market and getting her out of our face). And should you ever really get the itch to jump the fence and live life on the other side... just do it! Don’t lead us on, don’t cheat on us, don’t sneak around, just end the relationship. If it ends up being a GIGS fueled mistake… oh well, consider it a hard lesson learned and leave us alone... we won't want you back anyway!'

I absolutely agree!! with no 3.. HAHA

Alhamdullilah

2010-05-27T22:58:00.007+08:00

Shits happened in relationships. Its unavoidable. But to make it last, both have to stay strong.

And so, another new chapter begin in us. Us being together. Starting all over again. Yes, we are one again now.

This wouldn't have happen without the help of Izzah Nazurah. We owe her big time. Thanks darling (:

It paid for the bucket of tears I cried the whole night and half of the day today. We talked things out and get a clear explaination from our dearest miss Izzah Nazurah. Things are clearer now. Everything's okay. (:

Dear sweetheart,

We have gone through lots of shits. But I do hope you remember the moments where we are on cloud nine. Just remember that no matter how tough our relationship can get, I will never give up on you. No matter how hurtful my actions are, remember why you still hold on till now.

I know things get out of hand. Patience have limits. But do remember, everyone's has the same feelings. And by that, it includes me. Whenever you feel like giving up, remember all those talks you had on me when I was on the verge of giving up. The feeling, the fear you had when I showed signs of leaving you, same goes to me. I felt those fear.

Im glad we're starting all over again. I can't imagine us on separate ways. we've gone through so much that you've become part of my life; you're part of me. When you're gone, half of me is gone too. You're my other half, and no matter how worse the situations are, I will always need you in my life.

And with this, I hope this time round, we work real hard for this. I'll give you time to change. I'll try my best to understand you. I'll be more patient than before. And I hope you do the same to me too.

I love you, always and forever, eternity and beyond. ♥

2010-05-26T21:22:00.003+08:00

And so its finally over. Things that I feared almost every night of my life, done and over. Im sure he's happy with the decision.

Apparently, someone has been so sensitive. A person who knows me very well would know if I was joking or not. A friend was feeling2 nak practice to become a good husband. And he happens to tell me that when he was doing my hair. So, as a JOKE, I told him Im like the wife. Is that even wrong? And so what if I posted it in FB? EVERYONE knows who is my boyfriend. EVERYONE knows that whatever I said was a joke. Because THEY know me and him are friends, close friends.

The next thing, I thought, I actually thought we have solved the matter. Someone says its never too late to change. And just after saying that, someone did the same thing again. Well, if I were a boy, I would have definitely cancelled things to prove to the girl my promises. And no, it does not happen to me.

I don't go looking for other guys for happiness. It just happens that I got more guy friends. And whenever Im sad, they are there to cheer me up. Am I in the wrong position now? And no, its not only guys. But there are girls too.

If I were not sincere to love you, I would have long leave you behind and went for other guys. My guy friends are better at treating me then you are. But did I? No, I did not. I stayed. And now its all about me not being sincerely in love with you.

I treat you as last priority? Well, yeah you're right i guess. Me not going to school in the morning with friends. Me not having lunch with friends. Me not spending time after school with friends. And yes, after all this, you are still the last priority. And I wonder where do my friends stand then? What is after last?

If I treat my guy friends more important than you, explain to me, why when my status changed to 'single', all of them msn-ed with me asking how i am, cheer me up and stuff but not a slightest bit did anyone tried to take advantage of that. Neither do they try to flirt nor do they try to replace you. Well, of course, they are nothing more than a friend!

I did not try solving things out whenever we are in a fight. Okay fine, I'll take this blame. But all the time I did this? Really? I don't think so. I think I did have done something in this SOME times.

Oh well, I think its useless explaining all this since all is over. But here's the thing. Where has that one guy who used to say we shall stay strong no matter what happens? Where has that one guy who has faith in us and tell me that no matter how we are at the very worst, we are one? Seems like the one who is strong all along is the one who gave up on this first.

Im thankful for what you have done to me so far. I appreciate every little bit of it. I don't have to show it in words do i? Yes, it may seems like I appreciate others more. But God knows how exhilarate I am when you did something sweet to me. I can show my appreciative towards you in any ways, but with friends, I can only express it in words. And you are being so uptight about it? Maybe the way I showed it to you was not enough. Im sorry then.

I hope you would find that one girl who will make you happier than I did. You deserve better I must say. Jusyt one thing, to make her happy, treat her like as though she's the only girl in the world. Treat her as though she matter so much that you won't want to lose her. Treat her more special than a friend. Im sure you guys will last forever. (:

You're perfect to me in any ways. Just that sometimes I feel like as though I was no one. And we talked. We talked about this. Not even a slightest bit have I ever thought that it's gonna end up like this. Have I ever asked for this no matter how upset I am? All I asked for was to start all over again. This is how we compared the ones with faith with the ones who don't. And when I asked for it, we talked. But for this, have you?

You think Im happy? Obviously, you don't know me well enough. You broke my heart. You lost my trust and faith. But I know, you're happy. Its your choice, you made up your mind. And I know the people around you, your friends, your family, they are happy with this too.

Thank you for that first day when you entered my life, and gain back my trust and love when I was terribly heartbroken at that time. Thank you for ruining it all over again. Thank you for the love you once shared with me for the past 3 months. Thank you for the time you spend for me. Thank you for all the sweet things you've done for me. Thank you for being there for me for 154 days since the day we met. Thank you for making me the happiest girl on earth on 22 February. Thank you for making me the saddest girl in universe on 26 May. Thank you for making me smile everyday for that 154 days. Thank you for everything.

Mine will never fade till the time has come. I love you, always have, always will. (:

2010-05-26T13:08:00.003+08:00

And my hair is chopped off. )':

So yesterday's experienced was really scary, although Im not the one who's taking the exam. HAHA. I didn't went alone because my sweetheart accompanied me. Such a sweetheart kn. I love him many many. At least I was not lonely throughout the journey. He just know how to make me smile. Hehe! ♥

Im remember, thats why

2010-05-25T10:19:00.004+08:00

I have a boyfriend. I have a boyfriend. I have a boyfriend.
I must remember that.
So, however I want to, I should say no.
Anyway, thank you to you guys who willingly volunteer to accompany me.
Awww, so sweet. (: Can be my boyfriend la like this. HAHA. K joking -.-
Sorry to reject your offer. You guys know my situation. (:

I really want to advertise myself la now. No girls want to offer themselves. Hmph.

2010-05-25T09:54:00.003+08:00

I want to have more girlfriends. Close girlfriends.

I am not lesbian. Im a girl. And I need girls to be my friends.

Im bored. Haha. Going to meet Kelvin at Chinatown to check my hair and maybe trim it abit. ALONE. See, thats why I need a girl friend. Because the ones that volunteer are .. Okay bye.

Again, after so long, now then I updated. And many things have happened.

1) Its our 3 monthsary!

2) Im sick of staying in Malaysia

3) I got a kitten

and many more. K will update again when I feel like it. HAHA bye.

unappreciate.

2010-05-17T22:07:00.003+08:00

If I could have just one wish, I wish my life would end any time soon. I would be grateful to have just a wish.

At the age of 18, I'm tired of my life. I'm tired with the dramas that revolve around my world. Im sick of being happy for a few seconds and end up being disappointed for hours. This year, I'm going through so many things. And yet, its only a quarter of the year.

Im happy. Im thankful. But with too much disappointments, eventually I give up. I don't know why it seems that people always expect more from me. I am me. I am myself. It's hard to change a part of me that I am so used to. Well, at least I'm trying.

People say I have ego, not knowing that they have it too. Everyone has it. Who doesn't? But whenever things happen, its always my ego are at fault. Ever wonder that maybe both play a part in this? Or just maybe your ego are bigger than mine that you can't seem to admit its your fault?

Ever thought that maybe I did compromise many things? Ever reflect that maybe I did give in most of the times? Ever contemplate that maybe I was crying a little too many times at the things that other people have while I don't? No, nobody ever bother to see my side of story.

There are times I wanna give up and let go of everything I have. Yet, I still hold on. Because I love the things/people I have in my life. Somehow, I am not being appreciated. And I guess that's my weakest point. To give up when not being appreciated.

Have I?

2010-05-11T16:23:00.002+08:00

Every girl needs a man. You know, the kind that’ll treat you right. The kind that has enough respect for you & is willing to change, just to be with you. The kind that searches for you with all his heart & that can be trusted in a room full of beautiful girls. Every girl needs a man who won’t cheat on her because he knows she’s got all that he wants & needs already. He won’t mind calling you early in the morning just to say good morning or late at night to say good night; maybe even sing you a good morning song & tell you a bedtime story or talk to you until you fall asleep. This guy will be the kind that’ll do anything for you, even if it’s to just go to the store & buy you your favorite kind of candy. He would defend & fight for you & wouldn’t bail on you for his friends when you need him most. The kind that won’t leave you lonely & wondering; the one that calls you surprisingly, even if he’s out with his friend, to just tell you that he loves & misses you a lot. The kind that isn’t afraid to smile to his friends every time you’re around & tell them, “She’s the one”. The kind that appreciates you for the things you do for him, even if they’re little. The ones that actually thank you for the little love notes you leave him, waits for you when you’re falling behind, & opens doors for you. Every girl needs a man who will take you out on dates once in awhile & buys you flowers just because it’s a Wednesday. The kind of guy that notices your hair when you just got it cut or done beautifully for him. He would remind you that he loves you & that he’s happy to be with you, just in case you forget. The kind that just doesn’t want kisses & hugs, but to actually be loved & to love. You deserve a guy that will call you beautiful instead of hot, who kisses your forehead when you’re down, tells you to be strong & to not cry, & when you do cry, he’d cry with you when times are hard. The kind that will go through thick & thin with & for you. The kind that just loves you for who you are & not for who you aren’t and loves you because you’re his favorite girl in the whole wide world.

Have I really found him?

Smoking kills. It kills your money.

2010-05-10T16:17:00.003+08:00

Im bored so I wanna blog. And I just had to post this.

My faci was telling my class about this one rp student who used to be in her class last semester. So this guy was a smoker. And one day he was determined to stop smoking. In class, he was fidgeting and look restless, but he did not give up. He told faci he is really trying hard. By trying to stop thinking about smoking, he pop some sweets occasionally and went for exercise. This semester, he actually succeeded in quitting smoking. IN ONE SEMESTER. I want to meet this guy seriously and congratulate him in person. :D

So smokers, I swear Im gonna give a million middle fingers if you say it is impossible to quit. Yes, its HARD, its TORTURING, its a HELL. But with determination, anything is possible.

It's not that I am anti-smokers. I myself don't believe those bullshit about the cancer thingy and stuff. And smoking kills? Well, it MIGHT happen right? But the main thing that really pissed me with these smokers are the ones who claims that they are broke/poor/no money but actually have the money to buy a pack of cigarettes! Like seriously, don't these smokers have COMMON SENSE?! If you fucking have no money to spend on your daily needs, then might as well not add up your misery by smoking!

I really hate this kind of people. Like what my mum said, she don't care anyone who smokes including me. Just as long as I know that I am very well capable of spending on it. Truth is, Im not. I might just as well spend it on food rather than this bullshit. For once, I agreed with my mum's judgement. Suckers.

Just wanna share something with you guys. So long! (:

Summary of my life.

2010-04-29T21:13:00.002+08:00

School:
It's coming the third week of school, and Im already starting to slack. -.- No Dian No. But, surprisingly, I got 3 As in my two weeks of school! Everyone say yaaaay. I knoww right, very shocking. Dian - A grade? So not a good combination. Nevermind, this is a motivation for me to get more As. HAHA.

Friends:
I think I sort of neglected them. ): Im so sorry. I definitely miss you guys.

Love:
Me and boyfriend is pretty much in good terms nowadays. In fact, its getting better each day. We're giving a month to improve on ourselves to become a good gf/bf. So far so good. Well, of course to me, everything is fine. Not sure what he thinks though! hehe. I love him many many. ♥

Family:
Oooooh, I guess lots of ups and downs here. My situation are mostly the downside. -.- Im beginning to hate everything that is happening. Like totally. Tsktsk. But of course I still love my family. (: And gossssh, when will I start praying back ah? Looking at my family praying together make me sad only. Please la Dian, can don't malas2 anot. Okok, I shall start ASAP. Tanak banyak dosa. -.-

Myself:
Hah. Im tired. ):

2010-04-28T22:29:00.003+08:00

A week and a day without blogging. Seems like Im busy with my life, NOT. I think my life have more freedoms than I was in year 1. Tsktsk. Just that Im being more lazy now. Lazy pig.

Anyway, although Im not as busy as the bees but really, Im tired. Problems after problems. Dealing with it was one thing, solving it was another. Its tiring. And some people refused to understand my situation.

I want to list down all my worries, my sadness and everything that I bottled up inside me. But then again, its better not to say anything.

Ish3

2010-04-20T23:02:00.002+08:00

In the morning, a few minutes after lesson starts..

Faci: Why are you late?
Boy: Meet friend.
Faci: So your friends are more important is it?
Boy: Yes.
Faci: Well okay then, next time come into class first then you can go out and meet your friends.

During lesson..
(Apparently, he pick on Ivan, he's Indian)

Faci: Eh thambi, what's the answer? (referring to the questions on the slide)
Ivan: I don't know..
Fastforward..
Faci: Are you gay?
Ivan: No, Im not.
Faci: Are you sure you're not?
Ivan: Trust me, Im not gay.
Faci: Well, if I "trust" you, you won't be gay.
Awkward silence in class.
Faci: Trust with the H.

Get it? Thrust. So its like, if he thrust his eherm to Ivan, will make Ivan gay. -.-
Horny bastard.

For those who can't stand profanities or me saying vulgar, please do not read this post. Because at this moment, I have this anxiety of saying all the profanities in one shot. I know, so not me. And yeah, if any of you guys realised, I've been using it for a little too many times these few days. Haiz.

Let's start with today module. Today's module is sociology. It is a very interesting topic I must say. But the faci damn fucking bullshit. The moment he speaks, I've already had this hatreds towards him.

This faci wanna step like so macho and handsome. But he's a damn old faggot who probably have 100s of grandchildren. He speaks like as though he rule the world but sadly my classmate rule him out. Unfortunately, he's not that coward to back off and still sticks to his nonsensical attitude. Macam Cibai like that.

One more thing, he's a freaking horny bastard. Like what the fuck ah with all the horny jokes. Its not cool at all seriously. -.-

I think my blog post are getting more boring each day. Not that I've got nothing to talk about. There's millions of things on my mind that I wanna spill out. But I am just purely lazy. Lazy bitch.

K la bye.

2010-04-19T23:06:00.003+08:00

Haiz. I don't really know where we are going now. Seems like its getting worse every minute passed. Okay, I will take the blame. I will accept that all are my faults. But really, I hope, I really hope people should ask before saying anything. This applies to everyone.

Now, its not fair right to get a sarcastic remark when you did nothing or say nothing at all. But nevermind, I'll just pretend I've said something so not true and actually hurt 2 party. Sorry very much.

Guys, whenever you deal a bad situation with me, please don't give in. Please don't take all the blames. Because it seems that everything is started from me. Yes, ME. Everything is on me. So let me be the one to take the blame. Blame everything on me.

2010-04-18T16:33:00.002+08:00

So here I am once again after what seems like dinasours years since I've updated. School has finally started and the FOPS have end with the SHL being the champions. I am still euphoric over the fact that we have won this year. Now there's no reason for the SOH to look down on us.

My new class is great. It's somewhat noisy but we're not yet bonded. Nevermind, it's only the second day though. Such a sad case me and rahmat stick to each other like a glue since school started. Reason being we don't know anyone in class. Well, I do know a few of them, 2 from my previous class, but well, not the type of people that I would be seen hanging around with. Lucky there's Rahmat. :D

I really don't have the mood to blog but I feel like sharing something here. I am not okay. Yes, that's it. I am downright not okay.

I'm not a person who would show to people that I'm feeling down although those who clearly can read my expression would sense the difference. But I would never share about my problems or feelings even to my closest friends unless its necessary. But now, yes now, I feel like telling the whole world what's my bothering me at this point of time. For once, I want to let out all my feelings that I've been bottling up inside me.

Yet again, here is not a place for me to share something so personal. All I need is someone whom I can share everything, every single thing, and actually knows how to make me feel better at the end of the day.

And again, not everything can be solved if we share it with others.

morning kemoaning.

2010-04-08T08:02:00.002+08:00

I am very suhleepy. But I don't want to sleep. I feel like blogging. But I don't know what to tell story about. I feel like telling story kemory of my dad.

Today, my dad very the perangai. I think he sleepy thats the why. But seeing him talking nonsense make me want to laugh because it tickles me. Because its hard to see him in this behaviour. HARDLY. He's always the serious man. So when he perangai like this morning, very the cute like that.

So, as usual, in the morning we head to the immigration. Like duhh. -.- After scanning passports at Singapore immigration, we head to the check item there. I know I very selenge, so long in and out still don't know all these places. Then suddenly my dad nagged about something.

"Biol betol la dekni. Tak tau nak drive kedepan. Sebok nak membontot kereta kat depan"

So it happens that the car infront of us refused to drive to another lane. And my dad can't drive to another lane because the car seems to hinder the pathway.

Mum: "Agaknye dier tu malas agaknye nak drive."
Dad: "Takdela. Ni mesti case takot."
Mum: "Nak takot apenye?"
Dad: "Ntahla. Dah memang dier ni biol."

Then, the driver went out to open up his boot car (or car boot),

Dad: "Tengok ah. Muke pon macam biol. Patot ah biol."
Mum: "(Laughs) Tak baek abang cakap camtu."
Dad: "Ape. Betol la. Muke dah la biol. Perangai pon biol."

-___________________-" I think my dad got attitude problem today. HAHA. But he calling people biol, very funny.

Then, once we are out of the immigrations, at the highway there, we drove past 2 bikes. One of the cyclist, omg damn fat can. I think his size is bigger than his bike.

Me: "Woooh, besarnye."
Dad: "Macam beruang circus."

OMG so bad caaaan. HAHAHA!

After that, we sent Farah to school first. But it was damn early.

Dad: "Farah gi la teman security guard jage gate. Buat kawan dengan dier."

-_-"

I think he's the one who is biol. Veh biol. -.-

Cinta

2010-04-07T22:31:00.003+08:00

Cinta, perkataan yang senang disebut namun sukar untuk ditafsirkan. Cinta, walaupun ia hanya merupakan lima abjad namun ia membawa erti yang sangat mendalam. Bila disebut cinta, ramai yang akan tersenyum dan memberi makna ia adalah sesuatu perasaan yang sungguh indah. Namun tidak ketinggalan juga segelintir manusia yang tidak memaparkan keceriaan tetapi disebaliknya. Pada mereka, ia hanyalah sesuatu yang begitu menyakitkan, begitu melukakan hati si sang manusia.

Terlalu banyak makna diberi kepada perkataan yang begitu kecil ini. Setiap orang mempunyai maknanya tersendiri. Namun begitu, apakah sebenarnya makna cinta ini?

Ku cuba mencari erti cinta. Namun ku gagal untuk mendapatkan jawapan yang tepat. Akhirnya ku temui serangkap yang memberi makna cinta yang ku rasa memang padat dengan perkataan itu.

"Cinta adalah perasaan istimewa yang dianugerahkan kepada manusia. Cinta menghidupkan jiwa. Cinta menjadikan seseorang bahagia dan merana pada masa yang sama. Sesiapa yang memahami cinta akan menjadi tuannya, bukan hambanya."

Apakah benar definisi ini?

Padaku, jawapan ini memuaskan dan ia sungguh tepat sekali. Walau bagaimanapun,

Hanya kalian yang dapat menentukan erti sebuah cinta. (:

The truth behind the lies.

2010-04-06T23:16:00.001+08:00

HAHAHA. I think its sort of true?

Bawa ku terbang.

2010-04-06T16:35:00.001+08:00

Mata Ke Mata..
Ke Hati..
Hati ke Hati..
Hati Hati..

Bibir Ke Bibir..
Bicara Janji..
Janji Ke Janji..
Jadi Menjadi

Rindu ke Rindu..
Termimpi mimpi..
Hari Ke Hari..
Nanti di nanti..
Menanti Pasti..
Pasti Disisi..
Sisiku Kini..
Ternanti nanti..

Bila diceritakan tentang cinta
Segalanya muncul sekelip mata
Semuanya di depan matanya dia
Makan tidur pun tak lena

Dia cinta
Dia sayang
Aku dicinta
Aku disayang

Kamu yang bawa ku terbang
Kamulah jua yang membawa cinta
Ke jalannya..

Kamu yang bawa ku terbang
Ke bintang kejora cinta kita
Kekal untuk selamanya

Kita berdua kian bermesra
Rindu makin membara
Kita berdua bermain kata
Pasang surut tak endah

Dia cinta
Dia. sayang
Aku. dicinta..
Aku disayang

Kamu yang bawa ku terbang
Kamulah jua yang membawa cinta
Ke jalannya

Kamu yang bawa ku terbang
Ke bintang kejora cinta kita
Kekal untuk selamanya

Mata hati jiwaku
Seluas langkah di
Sebesar cubisan
Namun segitiga bermuda

Ku ganti sungai merah
Dengan darahku
Rinduku meragutkan
Kehangatan cinta kita

Mungkin tidak sehebat mana
Ku di pertikaikan kasih
Ku bukan tempat dua ketiga
Di hati ku cuma kau yang satu
Seterusnya nyatanya hanya
Dirinya jiwanya
Jiwa ku rentas benua
Warna angkasa cinta
Cintalah kamu

Kamu yang bawa ku terbang
Kamulah jua yang membawa cinta
Ke jalannya

Kamu yang bawa ku terbang
Ke bintang kejora cinta kita
Kekal untuk selamanya

Such a beautiful song (':

2010-04-06T13:32:00.001+08:00

You've touched these tired eyes of mine
And mapped my face out line by line
And some how growing old feels fine
I listen close for I'm not smart
You wrap your thoughts and works of art
And they're hanging on the walls of my heart.

I may not have the softest touch
I may not say the words as such
And though I may not look like much
I'm yours.

And though my edges maybe rough
I never feel I'm quite enough
And it may not seem like very much
But I'm yours.

You healed these scars over time
And braced my soul, you loved my mind
You're the only angel in my life
The day the news came, my best friend died
My knees went weak, and you saw me cry
Say I'm still the soldier in your eyes.

I may not have the softest touch
I may not say the words as such
And though I may not look like much
I'm yours.

And though my edges maybe rough
I never feel I'm quite enough
And it may not seem like very much
But I'm yours.

I may not have the softest touch
I may not say the words as such
And though I don't fit in that much
But I'm yours.

Why bother getting first when you get nothing in return?

2010-04-05T22:28:00.004+08:00

Today, the first day of the week, I actually fulfill my goal! Of course, it need to be done regularly, duhh. HAHA. But omgoodness, I did it! K, let me elaborate in detailed how's my first try.

K, so I started off jogging in this looooooong track that leads from toa payoh to bishan. Its around 5500m distance. So I very confident start running. I was panting like a mad dog half the journey but I didn't stop until I reach at the other end. Ahh, achievement! :D 5500m dok!

Then nearby bishan got stadium. So I walked all the way there. Feeling2 nak continue jogging at the stadium track but then I saw toilet! Then konon2 saket perot ah. Actually not. Just want to sit longer at the toilet bowl. HAHA. Then sit infront of the fan dunno for how long. Then finally I went outside to continue jogging. Suddenly I got no mood to jog at all. But I forced myself to run and I did. Just for one round. -.-

After that I got jealous of the old people over there. They jog many rounds around the stadium and they are not even panting! So embarrasing man. So I went out and continue jogging at the long track. So from Bishan back to Toa payoh. But HAHA. Fail attempt siol. Halfway I already panting. Before that, I saw this group of primary school kids with their teacher jogging on the track also. Halamaaak, all so active sia. Then when I was still jogging and actually left them waaaaay behind, suddenly appear this primary school boy overshoot me. Offended siol! How can he run faster than me. Then another boy jogged pass. And I heard the boy ask the other one who got first this question "Why bother getting first when you get nothing in return?".
-__________________________-"

Eh, although we get nothing in return but by getting first, its a sense of achievement! Halamak ni budak. Yes, I feel proud whenever I run and get in first. Because to me, I did it! But oh wells, there is some truth in his statements. Even if you don't get first but you complete the rounds, you still achieved it. Hmmm, k la whatever. Its just the feeling. HAHA.

So, I gave up jogging. My "ulu hati" is hurting already. I don't what its called in English. HAHA. So I walked throughout the journey. Before that still sempat dudok bawah blok ambil angin sekejap. HE HE HE.

K, so its not a continuous jog. But hey, I achieved my goal of running 5 rounds of stadium. In fact, more than that ah! Hmpfh! Cheyy, eksyen. HAHA. I think around 6 rounds of stadium kot? Or maybe more? Definitely not less okay!

K la bye

Legal the second

2010-04-05T22:03:00.002+08:00

HAHA. Happy being the second legal birthday within our group. HAHA to Fatin and Iqah, NOVEMBER babiesssss. :p

Oh well, meet this dear sweet bestfriend of mine. I call her laro she call me muji. My 4 years + friend and still counting onnnn.

Dear Laro,

Today is your special day indeed. And makes it different from any other years before this, is that you have finally reach the legal stage. Finally, we can take license and enjoy the legal activities. However, do take care of yourself aite dear. :D

You have been a very sweet best friend to me. You're so good at cheering me up when Im down. And of course not forgotten your special skills in "guys". Haha! Whenever I am heartbroken, you'll be the person to knock some sense into me.

In my whole life, I've never seen your worst anger ever. You're always that smiley pretty girl who just loveeeee to flirt. HAHA. K not. But true enough, its very hard seeing your angry side. And thats what I just love about you.

I love your one hair strand. I love your pose without specs in every camwhore. I love your sexy smile. I love your laughter. I love you in just the way you are. Sounds mushy but really, I do love you. Of course, as a friend - best friend. :D

And so again, welcome to the legal world! Hope you enjoy every seconds of your life today. We shall celebrate soon okay! :D

merindu kepastian

2010-04-04T02:38:00.000+08:00

Andai kau menjadi pelangi
Biar ku jadi awannya
Agar kita selalu bersama

Andai kau menjadi sang duyung
Biar ku jadi karangnya
Agar kita sentiasa bersua

Andai kau menjadi merpati
Biar ku menjadi sang bayu
Agar kita sering bertemu

Andai kau menjadi puisi
Biar ku jadi melodi
Bersama kita menyanyi

Andai ku menjadi rembulan
Sudikah kau menjadi kejora
Hingga pagi nanti

Andai esok aku menjadi tanah
Sudikah engkau menjadi bunga
Menghiasi dadaku

Good Friday is good for me.

2010-04-03T01:44:00.002+08:00

Hehe. Remember, WITHOUT A DOUBT. :D

Oh well, Happy Good Friday you people! Was it good for you guys? :D

As for me, hmmm.. nothing much I must say. But its good in terms of nothing bad happens to me? Haha. So my familia spent a day out jalan2. Although my dad's not really good with the directions in Malaysia, but its not a hindrance for us to enjoy a day out in a foreign place. True enough, we got lost quite a number of times. Funny thing was, we keep driving at the same round-about for 4 times! And finally, we decided to follow this Singapore car and yes, lucky enough we're heading to the same place. L-O-L pleaseeee.

And selamat bertunang to Nadhir's sister. Erm, not really sure what's her name. But yeah, congratulations still. :D Dah pun bertunang. Now counting days to Kak Niena's tunang. Then then Dianadhir's turn! Cheyy, gatal. HAHA.

Can you guys believe it? School is in two weeks time! Suddenly, I feel like holidays are not really that long. But so what. Im looking forward to school. Yesyes! Oooh, can't wait. And Im kind of nervous getting to know my future class and my future classmates. Hopefully, this time I get a different class. HAHA. Pity me and umar y'know. Stuck in the same class for 2 semester, not funny okay. But this is veh cute. You see, the thing is. Im stuck in the same class for 2 semester and so is Umar. And the next cute thing is, our class is opposite each other. :D So we have been neighbours for 2 semester straight. Oh wells, we're not gonna be neighbours anymore since he is DOAL and I am DSLM. Haha

Im counting days to FOP! Can't wait can't wait! :D

Say it again ♥

2010-04-02T00:59:00.002+08:00

The thing about love
Is I never saw it coming
It kinda crept up and took me by surprise
And now there's a voice inside my heart that's got me wondering
Is this true, I want to hear it one more time

Move in a little closer
Take it to a whisper
Just a little louder

Say it again for me
Cuz I love the way it feels when you are telling me that I'm
The only one who blows your mind
Say it again for me
It's like the whole world stops to listen
When you tell me you're in love
Say it again

Thing about you is you know just how to get me
You talk about us like there's no end in sight
The thing about me is that I really want to let you
Open that door and walk into my life

Move in a little closer
Take it to a whisper
Just a little louder

Say it again for me
Cuz I love the way it feels when you are telling me that I'm
The only one who blows your mind
Say it again for me
It's like the whole world stops to listen
When you tell me you're in love

And it feels like it's the first time
That anybody's ever brought the sun without the rain
And never in my whole life
Have I heard words as beautiful as when you say my name

Say it again for me
Cuz I love the way it feels when you are telling me that I'm
The only one who blows your mind
Say it again for me
It's like the whole world stops to listen
When you tell me you're in love
Say it again (x9)

When you tell me you're in love...
Say it again

Ohhh... Ohhhhhh

Yeaaah, say it again. haha

Specially for Dyna

2010-04-02T00:27:00.002+08:00

I, Dian Farhana Binte Muhammad Yazid, would like to apologise to Nur Dyna Bte Osman for accusing her cheating my feelings.

K tk k, Abang Nadhir yang salah k. :D Senyum sikeeeet. hehehe

Happy April Fool's Day

2010-04-01T23:28:00.004+08:00

Finally the day has come to an end in a few minutes time. Yes!

Not that I don't like this "special" day. Omg, I love it. But I guess, it would only be fun if I were to be in Singapore or in school. So, today has been such a boredom to me. Sad case man.

To those who know me well, yes Im a prankster queen. Some actually awaits for my pranks today which sadly did not happen. HAHA. I guess thats the best prank ever by not playing pranks on anyone.

I was having a hard time communicating with people today. Because, whatever I say, they thought I was playing prank on them. Seriously, wthhhh. -.- And it include my mum. Pfft. I told her to wake me up in the morning because I want to go Singapore and she never wake me up. Because she thought I was fooling her. Tell me which part of it I was joking around?

People are so scared of my pranks. -.- If I were to think back, I didn't really pull a prank that much. Haha. So when I told laro that Im still in Malaysia, she thought I was fooling her.

Nevertheless, I did manage to pull a prank to my baby. In fact, I prank him twice. :D Sad case, this is his first time kene pranked by me. And because of that, I make him angry. Haha. Sorry b.

And like any past years, my mum succeed to pull a prank on me. But this year not really that successful. Unlike last year. The worst prank she ever done to me. Urghhh. Can't forget it.

So people, how's your prank? (:

Because I bored thats the why

2010-03-31T00:53:00.003+08:00

Leave halfway during FOP training. Sorry berry strawberry SHL peopleeee.

Find out laro and fatin wanted to give me a surprise but I was somewhere else. Sorry berry cranberry you guys!

Lastly, I got nothing to blog actually. But I still wanted to post something. And I hereby wanna dedicate this post to Nadhir's sister, Dyna. You cheat my feeling. Awak tak kasi pinjam buku. I merajok. Haha. I also merajok with Nadhir! He also forget to bring the book ): Huh!

Daring Dian.

2010-03-29T22:38:00.002+08:00

I am super tired due to today's training what's with the unbearable scorching heat and the non stop hits games. But the fun I had throughout the day manage to succumb my tiredness. However, at the end of day, I started to feel my whole body aching especially my back. The price I get for not controlling my stamina and my health. I no longer can stand the heat despite the fact that I was only under the sun for only an hour. I could endure heat that are worse than today for few hours last time. I can no longer participate actively in activities when I could actually do activities a whole day last time. Most disappointing of all.. I can't run anymore ): Not literally though. I can but not as fast as how I used to run.

I shall be more focus to my goal now. I shall start the routine soon. No more procrastinating.

Sweetness.

2010-03-29T01:10:00.000+08:00

When I look At You I see forgiveness
I see the truth
You love me for who I am
Like the stars Hold the moon
Right there where they belong
And I Know I'm Not Alone.

♥♥♥

Because I miss her thats the why ♥

2010-03-28T23:52:00.003+08:00

http://www.123greetings.com/send/view/03528610608442527417

http://www.123greetings.com/send/view/03428710008751126217

AWWWWW, K I MISS MY LARO RIGHT THIS MINUTE. NO WAIT, I'VE ALWAYS MISSED HER SINCE I LEFT FTPSS. ):

Because I love her thats the why ♥

2010-03-28T02:39:00.004+08:00

Now, where's this once a cheerful, bubbly girl I've known once? I miss her.

Just awhile ago I chatted with a girl who resembles alot like her. But its not her. Not the cheerful, bubby Nur Fatin bin Razak I used to know since sec 1.

This girl, whom I just chatted with, is my best friend. Someone so jovial, optimistic,a happy go lucky person is what I would have describe her in my almost 5 years of knowing her. Sadly, the person I just talked to minutes ago is not the old her.

As her friend, one of her best friend, sensing this changes is not a good thing. It upsets me and most of all, guilty that as a friend, I am unable to do much to cheer her up but just telling some words of encouragement which seems so useless at that point of time.

Dear bestfriend,

I know this won't do much but I hope that it could at least wash away some sadness from u and at the very least make u smile after reading this. I know how tough it is for you to go through your life at this moment. And what anger me most is that the thing that actually almost destroy ur happiness is none other than that one guy who have hurt you too many times before. I refused to call him human because he does not have any humanity in himself.

Just remember that I, WE won't ever ever ever be angry at you. No matter if you did any mistakes either big or small. We will always be walking by your side so that when you fall, we fall together. We will always be at your back, supporting you, so that when you give up and turn back, you still have us. We will always be at your front, so that when you feel lost, we will lead you. We will always be below you, carrying you to the top. We will always be on your top, because wherever you go, we will always watch over you. (:

As much as you love him, and I don't know how you feel about him now, but I do really hope this is the time you shall end the stories between you and him. Let's close this book once and for all and get new book to start a new chapter with a guy who truly deserves your pure heart and soul. He may once be someone who meants everything to you but he honestly does not deserve your everything.

I am not a person with power who can demand you to do anything. But I am a friend who cares. A best friend who know you longer than him. A person who loves you, well in a friend way of course. And here I am, as a friend, would want the best for you, your future, your happiness, you life. He already wasted part of your life. Let's not make him wasted a whole of your life okay?

And since this is the last time(I hope), I want you to cry and let out all the tears that are meant for him. Cry till there's not even a drop of it can ever come out from your eye. Cry for the very last time and vow to yourself, this is the last you'll ever cry for him. Isn't this what you, kaukau, iqah and stella have been advising me when I lost Awan last time? Well, maybe me and awan lasted not as long as you. But it comes to the same thing, we both get heart broken. And the only thing to do is move ahead.

After the crying session, spend time with friends. Yes, only friends. Don't find anyone just yet. You'll find yourself in confused state most of the time. Then, once you think you have that happiness in yourself and you're ready to love again, do so. Love is not just about feeling. Its about taking risk. Its about willing to fall many times over again and get your hearts broken over and over. But remember that, the one for you will always get you back up and never left your hearts broken for long. They're always there to mend it and trust me the one who is really for you will have that special weapon whereby they can mend your heart till its totally new. Patience is virtue. You'll find him soon. (:

This is just something that I think would help you. Just from my experience. And I hope it helps you too.

And with this, I end my grandmother story. Shall not bore you with me super merepek advise. Haha. You know I love you right lesbo. :D

Because I love him thats the why ♥

2010-03-28T01:46:00.004+08:00

When can I see my cute boypren in this formal clothes again huuuuuh? I loikeeeee. K must force him to dress up like this one day on a RANDOM day. Haha! Conferm he muncung semacam. Then he will fight back. The we will fight. Thennnn, haiya who mengalah part ni? Sayang dier jugak. Cheyy. Betol tak betol? Betoooool :D

B, I want to see you dress up formally. I don't care. Sayang I tk? HAHAHA

See, my beloness come already. Alaaaaa, I miss my boypren la. 1 week plus never see him. Videocall sometimes only. And only today after days we talk on the phone. Pity him having to pay quite a lot of amount since Im in malaysia. Haiz..

I don't care ah on tuesday when we meet, I want to be selfish. I want to stick with him like a glue. Ceh bedek. HAHA. But oh wells, I really miss him though ♥

Star light, star bright

2010-03-28T00:41:00.003+08:00

I want my ceilings to be like this. Macam nice only. But then this room of mine, the ceiling tanak kalah the height. Use ladder pon tak sampai kot. Seriously, damn high ah. Nvm. Shall take note of this and will apply it when Im home in Singapore. Cheh, apply. HAHA.

Im thinking more than twice whether I should start my goal now or not. When I think all over again, it does not seem really worth it. Imagine, I exercise and jog in the morning. By afternoon and at night, I ate double the weight I've lost. Comes to the same right? Tell me how to slim down like that? Haiyaaa. And I know you guys would tell me "oh, control la ur diet dian" "don't eat too much la dian" "bla bla bla la dian". Irritating eh this kind of people. Tell me easy or not to control your own diet. When you feel like eating, you eat right. Poke you peoples brain than you know. -.-

I guess nowadays Im getting moodier by every minute passed. I don't want the same reason to be the one that caused me being this way. But it does. First I felt cheated. Then I feel confused. Yes, confused. I wonder if it was just coincidence or there's a meaning lie behind all this. Im not sure of myself either. The dates were very coincidence in the first place. The place taken is DAMN coincidence. Funny huh? K this is a stupid lame shit stuff Im talking. Just don't bother.

My new goal

2010-03-25T10:20:00.002+08:00

It's only 10.20am and this is my fourth post. -.-

K, this time I wanna talk about my goal. And this goal of mine is all about health. Im worried about my body shape which seems getting bigger and bigger each day. Ape tak nye, since I stay in Johor, I eat non stop. Perot pon maken boncet. My weight is getting heavier and heavier. Haiz. The next thing Im worried about is my stamina. Im losing stamina bit by bit. Then how.. I got no ig that involve physical sports. Not like last time. I got silat, I got npcc, I got PE time.. Haizzzz.

Since I enter poly, my life just gets lazier and lazier. )': Planning to join Rugby but unfortunately Faz can't make it to Rp. Haiya. Want to join Silat but.. there's still a feeling of hesitancy. Its been a looong while since I've trained for silat and Im afraid I can't bare the trainings. Oh wells, shall give it a second thought. Thought of joining dragon boat but the schedule is way to hectic. Haiya so hard to choose.

K back to my goal. This is what Im gonna do everyday - stretch-ups, 30 sit ups and 20 push ups.
And this is what Im gonna do almost every weekday. Have a jog/run at the stadium at least 5 rounds. If I can do it last time, why not now. Its gonna be hard, but I'll have to endure. (:

2010-03-25T10:05:00.003+08:00

After days of stressing out with the released of my result, I finaly get a view of mine. Well, not me actually. Haha. At first asked Umar to check for me since he say don't scared don't scared. Unfortunately, he cannot view my workspace. I asked some friends of mine and they too can't view it. Thought of going to IT helpdesk. But then.. No Need! Because I have my own IT helpdesk who saves the day. None other than Nadhir Osman, my boypren ah. Hehe! He help me change password and all and tadaaaa, got my results.

The minute he told me my results, heartwrenching bodoh. I passed all the subject except math which I got the Fantastic F or so says Zac. Haha! I got so moody and people trying to cheer me up. But yes, I finally did once I heard what was being said by Nadhir's sister. All I have to do is to pass all my module for year 2 and maintain my gpa above 2 in order to avoid repeating my year 1 module. Best la. Of course I can do it! :D

And Im happy with my other results due to my effortlessly not doing it with all my heart. Despite the fact that I should feel regret because I know I could have get a better grade, but hey, all Im aiming for is a pass. To me gpa doesn't matter, yet. Wait till year 2 and year 3, then I'll care for my gpa grade.

However, Im still not happy with Umar's math grade! He ended it at around the same time as me, within 15 minutes, and he actually passed?! Totally unfair. Hmph.

2010-03-25T09:54:00.000+08:00

HAHAHA! This is funny shit. Please click to enlarge, Thank You. :D

2010-03-25T09:37:00.000+08:00

Alaaaaaa, so shuweeeet

2010-03-25T00:34:00.004+08:00

My pms are over but Im still frustrated with small stuffs. Why suddenly so many people is into sunflower. Sebok only. >:|

K lame la fussing over such matter. Haha. I think I want to change flower ah. Hmmm.. No, I still like sunflower.

Aquarius and Libra

2010-03-24T08:30:00.000+08:00

Both of these signs are attracted to unusual people, excitement, and loads of activity and socializing which made it a better than even chance that they would meet and fall in love.

And should Aquarius go rushing off at ungodly hours to help out a friend in trouble, Libra will not only understand but will probably go along. If Aquarius brings a down and out stranger home for the night then Libra will make up the spare room with no questions asked.

While there are some aspects of their personalities that will irritate the other they will find it easier than most signs to compromise.

The opinions of others mean very little to Aquarius he/she cannot understand how Libra can be wounded by a cruel remark from someone else and will possibly feel that Libra is being over sensitive.

In the past physical togetherness may not have meant a lot to Aquarius but with Libra all that can change radically as Libra is an impulsive lover and he/she could show Aquarius the joys of being spontaneous. A very good relationship that is likely to last. A match made in Heaven.

Eee, so ugleyy.

2010-03-24T08:15:00.004+08:00

My sickness damn weird. I think its because I am a weird person thats the why. Yesterday, I had high fever again. Today Im okay. However, my throats still sore. Later confirm fever again. But the sad part is, this is so not my worse sickness for this year. How I know? Ohh, because I guess it's like a habit/routine/must for me to have a worse sickness ONCE a year which involves all in one; that is fever/flu/sore throat/body pain/vomits..all la. Very weird I know. But since I was kid, that's how my sickness is. Lucky enough it is only ONCE. I hope this year it would be once and for all too but I don't know when.

Today, after so many days, Im finally back in Singapore. Scary la stay there alone. So I decided to follow my mum to her office despite me being sick and everything. But hey, Im strong y'know. Heh! And this morning sempat cut my fringe. Like finally. But it look cacat. Haizzz, shouldn't have been so gatal to cut off my fringe. Thought of having a new look. Definitely a new look and it is so.. Ugleyy. )':

Wanna see?

Seeeeeee effinguglyahplease!

K, what's done is done. I should have known better to go salon and have it cut. -.-

One month to diaNadhir ♥

2010-03-22T12:01:00.004+08:00

Cheers to our one monthsary. However, this is just the beginning step to our relationship. (:
I felt terribly bad because we have to cancel our date today due to my sickness. Haiz. But its okay, we shall celebrate it soon once Im well okay?

Anyway this dear of mine is very the sweet with 24 cherries on top. Hehe! At 12am sharp, he msg-ed me just to wish me happy one monthsary. Aww, didn't see that coming although I was abit suspicious when he called earlier and remind not to put on silent mode. And here's the special part from the msg. Something that he dedicate for me.

[D] earest baby of mine..
[I] love you more than anything..
[A] mazing in everything that you've done for me..
[N] ever fail to put a smile on my face on my worst day..

[F] orever and ever, eternity and beyond my dear
[A] n angel fall from heaven
[R] edirects me to the right path of life..
[H] eavenly pleasant when she smiles..
[A] ttractive in any way..
[N] ever I regret loving you..
[A] nd lastly, my one love, one heart, one life for sure...

Alaaaa, so shuweeeet. K, I blushing already. Haha! Hmmm, now here's a little something for him too!

[N] ever have I imagined
[A] person like you would be the one
[D] oing such a marvel to my life.
[H] ow wonderful the feelings I felt
[I] s exceptionally unexplainable; but one thing for sure, it’s all
[R] eal.

[O] verwhelmingly impressive in every way you are;
[S] o amazing that you
[M] anage to capture my heart.
[A] nd I hope that this feeling shall last forever. Just as long as you
[N] ever ever forget that I truly love you.

K, its not really that good since I just prepared this instantly. But I hope the message is clear enough.

I love you la Nadhir Osman.♥ ♥ ♥

My fever is getting better. Its not really as high as last night. But my headache is killing me. K this is weird. Why my headache take ages to disappear. hmm..

2010-03-21T21:24:00.002+08:00

Having headaches was the worst sickness ever and worse having fever adding up to the sickness. More worse then hell? High fever. Its been a while since I fall sick so I guess this will be the worse sickness ever. I hate this I hate this I hate this alot. )':

Ah, read this! Totally me :D

2010-03-21T04:04:00.002+08:00

If you ever met someone that appeared to be charming, funny, tantalizing, and intelligent, he was probably from Aquarius Horoscope. They usually live in their own minds, filled with a world of ideas. Although they seem to possess a certain detached quality and may sometimes come across as removed from feelings, they are warm, outgoing, and very concerned with others.

These Humanitarians often are wary of emotion and like to deal rationally with life. Optimism is a big part of their nature, along with the knack of friendliness and the mastery of flirtation.

If you want to get the Aquarians attention, you will need to intellectually stimulate them. Good conversation, including debates are a favorite past time of the Water Bearer. Open minded, People under Aquarius Sign can accept criticism and understand others perceptions about things. If you have a problem, they are always willing to listen, though after awhile, enough is enough. Tolerance is a big part for Aquarians temperament. They are slow to take offense, never jealous and never over emotional.

When planning a date with an Aquarian, you don't have to go out of your way to impress them. Just about anything pleases them. From sharing a picnic lunch to a candle lit dinner, Chinese or Mexican, it doesn't matter, as long as variety is on the menu.

In time, a relationship can grow, built on trust. Never nag a person with Aquarius Horoscope about a mistake. A mistake is unimportant to them, so don't harp on it. If they are constantly told what is wrong, they will begin to feel unappreciated and the relationship can get rocky.

In any relationship, an Aquarian may find it hard to give of themselves but will always remain loyal and devoted to a worthy partner. When the Aquarius makes a promise, it's usually never broken. However, if you become demanding, and critical, they may start to wonder elsewhere.

People under the Aquarius Horoscope want a partner to share in the adventures, along with the challenges, that life has to offer. Life with them will never be boring.

Aquarius

Perfect Partners:

Gemini, Libra

Nearly Perfect Partners:

Aries, Sagittarius

Not Your Destiny:

Taurus, Scorpio

very slengs.

2010-03-21T03:36:00.003+08:00

He can't stop laughing after this.

Me: dah i dah selete
Me: delete*
Nadhir: selete! mcm selet!
Me: kk dah cukop
Nadhir: u tadi gi toilet u selet ehhhh... sbabtu tu word came out
Nadhir: hahahahaha!

-_____________________-"

Me: hehe okok. i go sleep spoon
Nadhir: spoon!
Me: DAHDAH
Nadhir: u sleep spoon
me: -.-

Haiyaaaa. Always very selenge.

SHL Ooi!

2010-03-20T23:50:00.002+08:00

Am back from camp. One word, awesome-ness. Duhh, of course its awesome! SHL camp what. Where its all the sporty, spontaneous, fun people are in. Best. But really, its awesome. Tell me, where can you find a camp that is so free and easy? Can use handphone, can go smoke2 (but of course I don't), play games all day? This is SHL people. HAHA. Ok I better shut up.

As I've said, we played games all day. Yes, only games. But its not for us to have fun, we have to learn how to play it thats the why. But oh well, we still had fun. And with the "people" who actually makes the camp more fun. Who is the "people"? Oh, the two "interesting" people; never fails to make us laugh the whole day. How interesting? You should see it for yourself. Unexplainable. You will laugh till you can't laugh anymore.

And of course some interesting things happen. Like Hanisah sleepwalking, the massive search, the dance, the cheers and many many more. Its too much to explain in detailed.

This year, SHL gonna win! We worked hard on this. Despite the fact that we have the smallest amount of students in our course, we manage to get the second place for fop last year with the SAS, the biggest team leading up. But that's okay. This year, we will win the biggest team. Yeah, thats the spirit. K, I sound so semangat like that.

I miss my fop last year ): Very gerek.

And I want camp like this everyday. Can anot? :p

Alice in Wonderland

2010-03-18T00:14:00.001+08:00

I want. I want. I want.
Who wanna watch with me?! :D

):

2010-03-17T23:34:00.002+08:00

1. Supposingly, Im accompanying my sister to school for her cca. But because of that stupid security guard, I cannot stay long. Only security guard, want to act big already. Very irritating. Then, I felt lost because I don't know where to head off actually. Unfortunately for me, Fatin and laro can't make it. But then, thanks to my sweetheart girlfriend nadIAH a.k.a SITI(HAHAHA), she's the saviour of my day. Spent the day with her at her house with the people. Then, head off to court for their netball training.

2. The sun was being extremely mean today. Was scorching hot we can have barbeque at the pavement. But then, nearby the court.. Oh well, let's just left this unsaid. But truly thankful to Nad for cheering me up. And her friends too for always asking how am I feeling. (: Awww, so shuweet. It was pretty much embarrasing to _____ infront of them since its my first time meeting them. And I feel so kental for _____. Like hello, me and ____ does not connect well. And I clearly remember this is not once I actually ____ infront of Nad, right Nad? Haiyaaaa. Why I so kental.

3. Indeed, I am terribly upset.

4. My dad, very superb. Everyday, one box of ciggarettes. -.-

me: Wahh, ayah ni hari2 beli rokok aje. -.-
mama: Sini kan murah.
me: Abeh, lau murah pon. tkyah beli hari2 ape. satu kotak, satu hari?! (This time I irritated already)
mama: Eh, dah bagos tu satu kotak. Dulu ayah dua kotak ah satu hari. Eh kau tak beli untuk Nadhir. Murah tau sini.
me: Dah sudah. Jangan nak macam2.
mama: Abeh nadhir satu hari brape kotak?
me: Dian suroh dier isap 3 batang satu hari.
*Ayah enter in the car*
mama: Hah, ade orang mengamok abang satu hari satu kotak. Dier cakap isap 3 batang satu hari cukop. Dulu, semangat nk quit. Cakap kasi satu bulan conferm boleh la haper la. Ni dah start heavy balek.
Ayah: Stress stress.

-.- Haiyaaaa.

5. Videocall with Izzaaaaaah. K I miss her very the muchies.

6. I've yet to pack my stuff. -.- Hello camp!

7.Dear camp, please make me a happy kid.

8. Im trying my very best to forget whatever happen especially the hurtful words.

I really don't know how am I supposed to react actually. I thought I did enough to satisfy the people in my surroundings. I guess they expect more from me. Im just so speechless at this moment. I don't how to explain it. Haiz.

2010-03-15T18:44:00.003+08:00

"
If you are going to fall in love with me, it’s only fair that you know what you are falling in love with.

You are falling in love with my insecurities, and my obsession with trying to figure out what everyone thinks of me. You are falling in love with my immaturity, my constant need to feel loved and appreciated, my overactive tear ducts, my internet obsession, my tendency to be too clingy. You fall in love with my troubled past, and my hopes and dreams, and how I’m a hopeless romantic at heart. If you fall in love with me, you fall in love with my self-hate and all my imperfections and my perception that nobody could ever love me.

But, you are also falling in love with the way my eyes will smile when I’m with you, the way I’ll text you in the mornings just telling you I hope you have a great day. You’re falling in love with the occasionally humorous and/or thought-provoking things I say, and the way I blush when people ask me about you. But to me, the most important thing will be that you are falling in love with me, despite my thinking that it is impossible. "

Coz he's unbelievable ♥

2010-03-15T11:56:00.002+08:00

Always said I would know where to find love
Always thought I'd be ready and strong enough
But sometimes I just felt I could give up
But you came and you changed my whole world now
I'm somewhere I've never been before
Now I see
What love means

CHORUS:
It's so unbelievable
And I don't wanna let it go
Its something so beautiful
Flowin down like a waterfall
I feel like you've always been
Forever a part of me
And it's so unbelievable
To finally be in love
Somewhere I never thought I'd be

In my heart in my head it's so clear now
hold my hand you've got nothin' to fear now
I was lost and you've rescued me somehow
I'm alive I'm in love you complete me
And I've never been here before
Now I see
What love means

CHORUS

When I think of what I have
And this chance I nearly lost
I can't help but break down and cry
oooh yeah break down and cry

CHORUS

Now I see
What love means

2010-03-14T16:17:00.000+08:00

wow

2010-03-13T22:00:00.002+08:00

So how's yesterday at work? HAHAHA! King of boredom deng. From 11am till I end work at 6, guess how many customer. Pathetic 2 customer siaaaaa. One around lunch time and another one at 5+. Me, Emily and Wenn jet had a time of our life enjoying the food there. But we got sick of the cafe's food, so Emily treat us Sari Indo food. Nice! :D

Today, I accompanied my one and only, none other than Nadhir Osman. There's a silat friendly match between rp and sp which was held in our school. He took part in it so I wanna give my support la kan. Everybody come on and say "AWWWW SO SHUWEEEET!". Hehe. K, I know I sweet. :p

Oh well, unfortunately it doesn't go well for him. He didn't manage to continue the match because the opponent kick his stomach or somewhere below or somewhere above there instead of the vest. So yeah, the pain. wooh. Understoodable k. But he fought good. Real good. And not because Im his girlfriend the reason I said this. But honestly, he is. Even others agreed and seem to praise him.

See b, you are a good fighter. Doesn't mean you lose, you're not. And doesn't mean when one is a good fighter, it means they will win every time. And doesn't mean they win, they are a good fighter. Sometimes they learn from the experience they lose and be better for the next match. That's what we called a fighter. In silat its not about winning, its about the techniques you do. You have the skills, you know the techniques. See, you are a fighter. A good one, I must say. Yes, its very upsetting when we lose. But don't be discouraged k b. You still have another match coming up. Have a positive mindset that you can win this time. (: Oh well, no matter what, you are MY most awesome fighter k baby. Hees.

Watching the match just now brings back my olden days. I still remember the tough training and stuff. And most of all, it brings back the memories of me participating the PSK. Ahh, the pressure at that moment. Sadly, I only manage to get to semi final. I still have a vivid visions on the day I lost my game. Not trying to brag or anything, but I was very confident I could win when I score alot of points during my first round and half of second round. But then, my stamina can't seem to hold on that I begin to lose point and my opponent gain more. Very upsetting. But oh well, nothing to care about now that Im not in silat anymore. :D

2010-03-11T23:40:00.001+08:00

Nice right, I knowwwwww. Humph. Nk.. )':

Another boring day at workplace. Wahh, today worse then yesterday. There's no customer till at around 5+. HAHA. So overall, I only "worked" for almost an hour only but I get 7 hour pay. Best eh.

So what I did today? NOTHING. As usual, me and meira cook whatever is in the fridge/freezer. K, let me tell you what I eat. Spaghetti -> drumlets -> ice cream -> choc + cookies n cream milkshake -> ice cream -> crepe with brownies and choc fudge -> peach tea -> strawberry smoothie. MANE TAK BONCET!

Then, when Im not eating, I sleep. Best.

eh, best!

2010-03-11T07:32:00.002+08:00

Yesterday work was bored. Very bored. I get my pay for sitting, eating, talking on the phone and

practically nothing. Well, yes it may sound like wowness but honestly, its not really wow at all. Like hello, boredom. -.-

But the good thing is, Im working with meira. Yayness. Miss her very very much. So, we had a good time frying all sorts of things, eating numerous flavours of ice cream, enjoying the cool weather while sitting on the chair and talk. :D Best.

Then, I disturb my baby. But haha, we quarrelled. So far, this was the most serious and the biggest quarrel we got into. Funny thing is, it wasn't really big at all. Just that he's angry(which he denied and says that he was actually sad), and then I got angry. And den he apologised which I said its okay but it still did not get any better. Den we did not msg each other until a few hours later when I msg him, apologising to him. He called, and tadaaaaaaa, we're back to normal. Yes, our biggest "fight" so far. Best.

At around 5+, wenn jet came with his gf. Alalala, his gf so shuweeeet. She accompanied him till he end work which would be around 12. B, u must teman me tau one day. Jadi sweet macam gf dier. Haha! Later I give u free food kkk. :D Best.

Meira and me got pranked. Total epic I should say. What happened was that, we got a call. Meira picked up.

Meira: Hello, ice3.

stranger: .....

Meira: huh?

stranger:....

Meira: Farhana, kau bual ah. Aku tk dgr ah ape dier cakap.

Me: Hello.

stranger: Hi, .....

Me: Sorry?

stranger: I would like to reserve a table for 4.

Me: Oh, okay sure. What time?

stranger: 7.

Meira: Mintak name skali.

Me: Can I have your name please?

stranger: wenn...

Me: Sorry?

stranger: wenn jet

Me: FUCK YOUUUUUUUUUUU.

-_________________________________-"

I swear he is irritating bodoh. Funny thing is, he was just standing right infront of us. And the reason why we can't hear is because he whispered so that we won't caught him. -.- Best.

B, I love you. B, I sayang you. Always and forever, eternity and beyond ♥

K la bye. BEST.

a b c, just random

2010-03-10T08:01:00.002+08:00

"You jump, I jump, remember? I can't turn away without knowing you'll be alright."

- Titanic

Hello, Im at mum's office waiting for my time to leave for work at 11 am. Behludy hell. -.- But I can't wait to work with meira, my minaaaah. hah.

I am very very suhleepy. And its only the second time. -.- Now I'll have to endure for Idon'tknow how long. Haiyaaa. I want to stay at ibu house ah! Shall psycho mama to let wan stay with us. Then I can have the room :D

Staying there like bullshit eh. No freedom. Haiyaaaa. Stress you know.

I miss my boyfriend ah. And he is angry with me ): Why? Because yesterday I cannot spend more time with him lor. Haish. See, Im a bad girlfriend.

I miss my bestfriends/friends also. Can't wait to meet ah.

Today I feeling2 to type singaporean languange with the lahs and ahs and lors. K la bye.

For my sweetheart ♥

2010-03-08T23:27:00.001+08:00

You can the peanut butter to my jelly
you can be the butterflies i feel in my belly
you can can be the captain
and i can be your first mate
you can be the chills that i feel on our first date

you can be the hero
and i can be your side kick
you can be the tear
that i cry if we ever split
You can be the rain from the cloud when its stormin
or u can be the sun when it shines in the mornin

dont know if i could ever be
w/out u cause boy u complete me
and in time i know that we'll both see
that we're all we need

Cause your the apple to my pie
your the straw to my berry
your the smoke to my high
and your the one i wanna marry

Cause your the one for me for me (for me)
and im the one for you for u (for u)
u take th both of us of us (of us)
and were the perfect two

were the perfect two
were the perfect two
baby me and you
were the perfect two

You can be the prince and i can be your princess
you can be the sweet tooth i can be the dentist
You can be the shoes and i can be the laces
you can be the heart that i spill on the pages

you can be the vodka and i can be the chaser
you can be the pencil and i can be the paper
You can be as cold as the winter weather
but i dont care as long as were together

dont know if i could ever be
w/out u cause boy u complete me
and in time i know that we'll both see
that we're all we need

Cause your the apple to my pie
your the straw to my berry
your the smoke to my high
and your the one i wanna marry

Cause your the one for me for me (for me)
and im the one for you for u (for u)
u take th both of us of us (of us)
and were the perfect two

were the perfect two
were the perfect two
baby me and you
were the perfect two

You know that ill never doubt ya
and you know that i think about ya
and you know i cant live without ya

I love the way that u smile
and maybe in just a while
i can see me walk down the aisle

Cause your the apple to my pie
your the straw to my berry
your the smoke to my high
and your the one i wanna marry

Cause your the one for me for me (for me)
and im the one for you for u (for u)
u take th both of us of us (of us)
and were the perfect two
♥♥♥

Gravity ♥

2010-03-08T13:53:00.002+08:00

Honey, It's been a long time coming
And I can't stop now
Such a long time running
And I can't stop now
Do you hear my heart beating
Can you hear that sound
Cause I can't help thinking
And I don't look down

And then I looked up at the sun and I could see
Oh the way that gravity turns for you and me
And then I looked up at the sky and saw the sun
And the way that gravity pulls on everyone, on everyone

Baby, It's been a long time waiting
Such a long, long time
And I can't stop smiling
No I can't stop now
And do you hear my heart beating
And can you hear that sound
Cause I can't help crying
And I won't look down

And then I looked up at the sun and I could see
Oh the way that gravity turns on you and me
And then I looked up at the sun and saw the sky
And the way that gravity pulls on you and I, on you and I

Can you hear my heart beating
Can you hear that sound
Cause I can't help crying
And I wont look down

2010-03-08T13:24:00.000+08:00

Sometimes it's hard to see the lines we've drawn until we've crossed them. That's when we rely on the ones we love to pull us back and give us something to hold onto. Then there are the clearly marked lines. The ones that if you dare cross, you may never find your way back.
Gossip Girl

So, where is the bright side?

2010-03-07T23:30:00.004+08:00

The sense of relieved when I can finally use internet. Ahhh, sensuality. After 2 days of not touching my laptop and not communicating with my baby for 2 days is an agony to me. My aunt and uncle stayed with us for 2 nights which somehow lessen my boredom, thank Allah. Heh! But the irritating part is all of them keep disturbing me. They caught me daydreaming often and they tend to sing some jiwang song. -.- Yes, I miss my boyfriend, thats the why. And they make me miss him more when they keep mentioning him. Confirm he tersedak-sedak pat spore eh. HAHA.

This is my third day staying in complete different environment. And so far, Im not liking it. Maybe Im not used to it thats the why. Oh well, lets give it a week or so and see if anything could possibly make me fall in love with this place. Lets look on the bright side. Ya right -.- The only bright thing I can see is the sun in a broad daylight. Pfft.

I still can't believe Im actually here. -.-

K, I am lazy to type long long about my place here. But but but, halamaaaak, the guys here hot hot heat ah. :p Olang singgaporrr lehhhhh. Ish, hotness giler. But as izzah said, no no no. HAHAHA. My Nadhir Osman tetap my hot hot heat sweetheart. Kn syg kn? Sayaaaaang u!

I wanna thank many many to my babylerp. He is such a shweetheart. Tankies for helping me angkat2 barang when I pindah that time. Even though you're tired and sleepy, yet you still come and help us. Awww, shweetness much. And sorry banyak2 if my aunty ke my abang sedare macam irritating much. Haha! Oh well, you have to get used to it aites dear. :D And I miss you lots lots. This tuesday we meet okaaaaay. Weee, lurp you veli the muchies. ♥

2010-03-05T02:15:00.000+08:00

No relationship is perfect, ever.  There are always some ways you have to bend,  to compromise, to give something up  in order to gain something greater.  The love we have for each other is bigger  than these small differences.  And that’s the key. It’s like a big pie chart,  and the love in a relationship has to be the biggest piece.  Love can make up for a lot.

Sarah Dessen

According to you.

2010-03-02T13:31:00.000+08:00

According to you
I'm stupid,
I'm useless,
I can't do anything right.
According to you
I'm difficult,
hard to please,
forever changing my mind.
I'm a mess in a dress,
can't show up on time,
even if it would save my life.
According to you. According to you.

But according to him
I'm beautiful,
incredible,
he can't get me out of his head.
According to him
I'm funny,
irresistible,
everything he ever wanted.
Everything is opposite,
I don't feel like stopping it,
so baby tell me what I got to lose.
He's into me for everything I'm not,
according to you.

According to you
I'm boring,
I'm moody,
you can't take me any place.
According to you
I suck at telling jokes cause I always give it away.
I'm the girl with the worst attention span;
you're the boy who puts up with that.
According to you. According to you.

But according to him
I'm beautiful,
incredible,
he can't get me out of his head.
According to him
I'm funny,
irresistible,
everything he ever wanted.
Everything is opposite,
I don't feel like stopping it,
so baby tell me what I got to lose.
He's into me for everything I'm not,
according to you.

I need to feel appreciated,
like I'm not hated. oh-- no--.
Why can't you see me through his eyes?
It's too bad you're making me decide.

According to me
you're stupid,
you're useless,
you can't do anything right.
But according to him
I'm beautiful,
incredible,
he can't get me out of his head.
According to him
I'm funny,
irresistible,
everything he ever wanted.
Everything is opposite,
I don't feel like stopping it,
baby tell me what I got to lose.
He's into me for everything I'm not,
According to you.
According to you.

According to you
I'm stupid,
I'm useless,
I can't do anything right.

2010-03-02T13:02:00.001+08:00

That thing, that moment, when you kiss someone and everything around becomes hazy and the only thing in focus is you and this person and you realize that that person is the only person that you’re supposed to kiss for the rest of your life, and for one moment you get this amazing gift and you want to laugh and you want to cry because you feel so lucky that you found it and so scared that that it will go away all at the same time.

— Drew Barrymore

Just thinking

2010-03-01T01:32:00.006+08:00

It's past one nearly two am. I've promised my boyfriend that Im gonna sleep once we hung up which was minutes ago. But oh well, I can't seem to put my hands off my laptop. Heh, should have listened to him when he asked me to off it before we hung up. Sorry dear, I broke my promise. But I syg u okaaaay. So please don't say "yelaa, mane nk dgr ckp i.. tk syg i lagi".. -.-

The reason Im blogging at this hour is because I am still not sleepy and I am bored. Also, something is niggling my mind at this moment. I don't know what is bugging me actually. My mind is all tangled up. There's so many things to think about and I caught myself in disarray.

Firstly, this would be the last week Im staying in my homeland. Suddenly I felt so woeful leaving this country. I know Im not leaving that far; just the other side of the sea. But still, leaving my homeland that I've spent for 18 years of my life is such a poignance. I know I've always been excited leaving this country for holidays but I can't force myself to imagine that Im leaving for holidays this time. Because Im definitely not. Such an allay that Im not leaving forever. Just a couple of years. And I would like that to be true or else..hmm, maybe I would earn money and stay here all by myself? Oohhh, yes Im gonna do that for all Im sure.

Secondly, staying at malaysia means lack of freedom. Even if I do have freedom, what can I possibly do there? With NO friends, not familiar with the road directory and so forth, it would be just like living in.. Hmm.. I would not like to picture how awful its gonna be. And of course, I can't meet my one and only boyfriend. )': Not only do I pity myself, but I sympathise him too. Could he hold on to this relationship knowing that his girlfriend is not there for him through his good and bad times? But whatever the future brings, I have faith in him. I know we're strong enough to face this. InsyaAllah. (:

Lastly, Im vexed with my non perpetual feelings. One minute Im fine, the next Im not. Just a small matter can make my feelings change drastically. And it got me so worked up and doubting myself. I just wished that I could start afresh and forget the past. Because the past has always been the ones that keep haunting me. Hmm.. Not to worry dear, this has got nothing to do with my feelings towards you. (:

And so, all this thinkings, worryings and doubtings combined together and you'll get a haywired mind. -.- That's exactly the state of my mind right now. But I'll try as might to be happy and look on the bright side. :D Not to worry everyone.

Oh, wait. This last paragraph here is for NADIAH DIYANA. Minah, I miss your laughter. I miss your hug. I miss your funny joke. I miss your lame joke. I miss your care. I miss your concern. I miss your scolding. I miss your advice. I miss your sweetness. I miss your love. I miss your "awak, kite". I miss our talkings. I miss our fun. I miss our silence. I miss our moments. I miss you being my scandal. I miss you being my girlfriend. I miss you being my minah. I miss you being you. Lastly, I miss you deeply from my heart. Meet me soon awak! :D

Of course not forgotten a special part for my sweetheart. Things will not be easier for us in the future. Yes, we have talk about it and we promised we're gonna endure it. I trust you. I have faith in you. Promise me few things? Don't ever ever feel glum when Im gone. Promise me, you'll live as how you are now. Promise me there will always be a smile outlining your face. Promise me there will always be your laughter echoing your surroundings. Promise me that even when Im not by your side, Im still in your heart. Promise me that you'll always lock my flying kisses and tuck it safely in your heart. Promise me that you'll never turn to another directions and leave me alone. Promise me that you will always love me. Lastly, promise me that you'll keep these promises. ♥

2010-02-25T16:56:00.000+08:00

"Before you, Bella, my life was like a moonless night. Very Dark, but there were stars--points of light and reason...And then you shot across my sky like a meteor. Suddenly everything was on fire; there was brilliancy, there was beauty. When you were gone, when the meteor had fallen over the horizon, everything went black. Nothing had changed, but my eyes were blinded by the light. I couldn't see the stars anymore. And there was no more reason for anything."

- Edward Cullen

Convo with Is

2010-02-24T22:02:00.002+08:00

A random convo between me and Is. I chatted with him after so long of not talking merepek things with him. So we started off talking about going clubbing. Then changed topic to driving license. Told him I cannot get bike license because a lot of people was against me taking it. And I was thinking of taking car license. Then, he said he thought of taking car license too. And we planned to enrol together. And we get started discussing about the price and all and suddenly he said this..

me: k we start saving money now
him: k set
atleast car klau accdnt pun mati trduduk ade aircon lagy..
hahaha
motor trcampak sane sini !
hahahaha

-.- HAHAHA! macam siak only. but yes, it made me laugh.

K i must be damn bored having random convo with alot of people today.

Convo with Adib

2010-02-24T18:03:00.002+08:00

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! This dear Adib can be such a blob at times. -.-
And don't get me started with the type of his dream girl. I swear its.. -.-

K im bored. Haha.

2010-02-23T15:37:00.002+08:00

Will always treasure this. I know its kind of late for me to upload this. I just found out I can embed this video. BAHAHA. Yes, a video made by mah baby loveeeee on my birthday. :D

w-ww-we're o-offf-official la sey! ♥

2010-02-22T23:05:00.008+08:00

So, I hereby commenced as of today, 22.02.2010 at 1.30pm, me and Nadhir Osman is officiaaaaaal :D

ohh, yes we are indeed. K i is a happy goober. :D

yeah, i know some of you would want to know how he "proposed" to me riteeeee. *both kenings up up*

So it started off like this. He came to my house..to clean up my store room. And I know once you guys read that, the first thing that came into your mind is.."Awww, Nadhir so sweet". -.- HAHA, not. He is being paid okay to do the job. Haiyaaaa. Tsktsk. But oh well, he is still my sweety pie. hees.

I was busy doing tea (It's a routine, so yeah.), when he called me from my dining room. I didn't attend to him immediately because I was busy pouring hot water. He called me again. For the third or fourth time or howmanytimes he called me, I finally went to him. Ingat emergency ape la kan. So as I approached him, he held out his hand and of course I took his hand la. heh.

me: what?
him: I know it's not really sweet and all but.. (something like that uh)
*he kneels down infront of me*
him: will you be mine?
*5 seconds gone*
me: are you serious?
him: yes.
me: are you serious?
him:yes
me: are you really serious?
him. yeeeessss. (I think by now he asked me why)
me: *giggles* of course laaaaa! awwww

Forgive my slow reactions and the repetitive so-tk-perlu question. But I'm stunned okay. Like hello, unexpected? Sooo, understoodable la eh. Anyway, yes it is very sweet of my baby to do that. Although the place cam spoil abit ah (my dining room?!) HAHAHA.

Time checked; 1:31:47 pm. HAHA. But he blame me for being late because its supposed to be 1.30 pm. So, we'll just stick with 1.30pm. And whats more special about today? its 22.2.2010.
Yes, its got nothing to do with my favourite number or his favourite number. Buuuut, 2x2x2=8!
Haha. Actually there's something with this 22 feb ah whereby me and baby planned something for the future. But sadly, it doesn't really work out. But its okaaaay, 2 dec eh b? ^.^

Anyway omg! I still can't believe im attached! Can u guys believe it? Like f-i-n-a-l-l-y. K actually no difference la. hahaha. but i still is happyyyyyyyy. i is happy goober. i is happy goober. :D

And I love this dear nad of mine. So sweet right put in her pm. hehe. I love my both nad ah. :D

k bye

Love you Nadhir Osman, my sweetheart boyfriend ♥

16 February

2010-02-17T16:06:00.003+08:00

A belated valentine's day celebration. Weeheehee.

Our plan was to meet at 2 but in the end we end up meeting at 3 at orchard station. Janji melayu. Bahaha. While waiting for Azmi and nana, I surprised baby the ciggs I bought for him. Im not supporting him to smoke eh! But oh wells, just wanna make his day and also because nana bought azmi ciggs! Takot la nanti orang tu merajok plak kaaaan tk dapat. hah! :p

Our initial plan was to have a picnic at botanic garden. But since we were all late and there's not much time left, we decided to abort that plan and just carry on to go "somewhere" else. -.- I was totally clueless about it until we were at the redhill station and board bus 145. Yes, we went to henderson wave. :D

Along the way, me and baby had fun communicate with each other using numbers. -.- It started off with the 143 bus. I told him 143, I love you. He kental or what don't know what's 143. HAHAHA! But yeah, kental2 pon I still sayang him ah. :p 1 5 4 3 6 5. Amacam, get it anot b? :p

Once we reached at the destination, we were all shagged. But the wind is so awesome, that our exhaustion cools down faster. Thank you awesome wind. :D There, I surprised baby with another gift. A gift that I took most of my free time doing and actually upset him because he thought I don't want to layan him. Hehehekz. But it still doesn't turn out the way I wanted it to be. Thanks to mama and sis for helping me at the very last minute to finish it up. :D

We left the place at around 8+ or 9+, Im not sure. Once at redhill mrt, I gave him my last gift. Well, not a gift. A love letter that I wrote specially for him. :D Hehehe. And finally, bid goodbye with him at raffles place station.

Dear, I may not be the sweetest girl that you've ever known. And I may not be the first girl you ever fallen for. But I hope that you accept me as who I am. And hopefully, I may be your last. (:

I love you Nadhir Osman ♥

I wanna go..

2010-02-12T22:18:00.003+08:00

Sunflower's field is in FRANCE! Bring me there and I swear I will love you eternity! Like for real.

So UTs are finally over. Yes, its O-V-E-R! Can you believe it? I don't, really. Im not a freshman anymore. T.T But oh well, now I can kerek2 with the new freshman. Bahaha. So, let me recalled how I did for all my uts.

Entrepreneurship - Easy. First to finish and leave class.

Cognitive - I swear people with common sense will find this tremendously SIMPLE. I find
it simple. :D No, it WAS extremely easy! :D :D First to leave class.

Math - Erm, ha ha ha. -.- With confidence, I had paper and SHARP pencil in hand with a calculator. I end up leaving the room FIRST within HALF AN HOUR with an EMPTY paper and still a SHARP pencil. -.- Do the honour to figure out how I did it.

Web and media - HE HE HE. IM LOVING IT. Done in 15 minutes. No, not because Im lazy or what. BUT IT WAS DAMN EASY!!!!!! :D First to leave class.

Marketing - If not for my mum, I would not have taken this ut. If not for the cab uncle, I wouldn't have reach school on time. I would have reached at 11.30am but I made to school in 10.45am. :D This time, ehem2, Im not the first to leave the class nor did I finished it early. Today I made a record of finishing the test after 11.30am. Im done by 11.45. :D Its.. erm, Im speechless. How do you define a person who just copy and paste from the 6p and the sentence just got nothing to do with the question? And how do you define a person who just use CTRL + F to search the keywords and copy whatever shit she saw? Clearly lazy.

So, any hopes for me.. to REPEAT? yes. choy3, touchwood!

2010-02-10T19:35:00.003+08:00

This is very random, I know. I miss E36F sem 1. -.- Yeah, I do.
Anyway, that's not the point actually. The reason Im posting this pictures is.. OMG, I look hot eh last time. Bahaha! K, Im serious. I think I look better last semester rather than this semester. See my smooth face. T.T Nownow, I don't know why this semester suddenly got alot pimples. K I stress. -.- I want that smooth face back uh! >:|

Ty

2010-02-10T17:37:00.004+08:00

I know its kind of late, but not too late to wish myself a happy belated birthday. (:

Thank you very much to those who wished me. I was thinking of typing down all the names here to say thanks to each and every one of you. But by afternoon on my birthday, I decided that maybe I could just wish thank you to everyone once and for all seeing that it would trouble myself typing all the names which seems endless. Haha.

And I would like to give a special thanks to my one and only baby, Nadhir Osman. Thanks for whatever you did for me on my special day. Nownow, stop sulking and think that whatever you did doesn't work, because to me, it does. You're the best gift to me dear. ♥♥♥

Now, I would like to say another thanks to this guy. I know you would come across this blog of mine so yes, this part is specially for you. Thank you very much for the wishes on your tumblr. Im glad that despite whatever happened between us in the pasts, you didn't keep any vengeance and hatreds towards me. Yet, you wished the best for me. With this, I would like to end with an apology too. Sorry if I've hurt your feelings in many ways in the past. Trust me, you have been the best of guy friend that I ever met in my 18 years of life. (:

P.S Im surprised that you actually remember the yellow bike thingy. HAHA. Sadly, many disagree with me taking a bike license. -.- Oh well, I guess.. riding the 50 cents bike would do for me then. :D Thanks again yeah. Appreciate your post very much. (:

Sunflower is the sex

2010-02-06T01:01:00.006+08:00

Macam best onlyyyyy. Does Singapore have Sunflower field? Someone bring me there, pretty please :D

So I guess we finally have decided that it's gonna be condo. I is happy. Yeah so what if there's no difference living in condo and living in this house. At least I know I will be happy living at the safest place with the best facilities and nice toilets. HAHA. Yeah, Im that fussy. But oh well, its not really really confirm yet. We will be going one of the days nxt week to see see look look at all the houses there. And oooh am I glad to hear that, I will only be living there for 1 year or maybe 2 instead of my whole life there? :D Depends on my dad actually. BAHAHA but I am still happy.

I can't believe freshman year is over! Like ... fast or what?! Im not gonna be mushy mushy this time with the fact that Im going to be separated with my beloved E36F sem 2. But I do love them :D Im gonna miss my classmates but definitely NOT the class. Having both sems in the same class is so not cool okay. But oh well, E36F sure did bring a hell lot of fond memories in my life (although I might forget it soon, thanks to my stm). I will definitely miss the whole period of sem 2 because We, the people in E3 Level SIX is the coolesssst man. YEAH, WE SURE ARE. Tell me, where can you get the latest and the hottest gossips and fights and scandals and blablabla uh uh uh?! In E3 level SIX la of course. Ceh, like proud like that eh. Haha. But true la, we are so happening baybeh.

Another thing that bothers me is my new class. Can I like appeal to be in a class full of hardworking students so I won't have to do any work? Or maybe I could appeal classmates like this sem whereby we confirm2 can get ppt from other class and thereby, I still won't have to do anything. :D Can I have super cool classmates who won't bother if I actually don't do work? So demanding ey Dian. But really, having to do worksheets and ppts does scares me off okay. NIGHTMARE. K maybe I should be more disciplined and hardworking when year 2 starts. Its year 2 for god sake. I should buck up. Really -.-

To E36F sem 2, I won't write long grandmother story here. Bahaha. Just wanna say you guys are great. Im sorry throughout the 15 weeks with you guys, I was such a loser and useless as a teammate. Sorry that I've never did any proper work and ppt and having to present the slides that you guys actually did. So sweet la still give me chance to present. K, I think I might love you guys a little bit more. Hah! K, for you guys' sake, I hereby promised to be more hardworking when Im in year 2. Kkk? :D

Okay. It's been a looooong time since I posted something long. Hehe. K how bout a last paragraph? ^.^

This one is for my baby baby baby ooooh. Today, you make a different of my feelings towards you. Not to worry, its not that kind of different. But I guess Im more certain with my feelings now. You make my heart grow fonder towards you dear. Always. ♥ ♥ ♥

2010-02-04T21:28:00.003+08:00

Yes ah, I made it today. I stayed throughout the whole lesson. :D But then, I should have partialed today instead of one of the last 3 days. I still have one more "leave" for entrepreneurship sey. But then, its okay. I love this module and I definitely love my faci. :D

Entre's faci is the best faci you could ever dream of getting in rp. Like for example, today, there's not ppt presentation and each group only have to do one question on the worksheet. We end class like around 2? Yeah somewhere around that time. This faci is coolness of the coolest; although he's old enough to retire. BAHAHA.

I am very dissappointed with someone. Umar promised me to stop smoking but semangat one week only. Haha. But then its okay la, as long as its cutting down and not fully back to heavy smoking. Oh well, as what he said, half a stick a day is better then a pack a day. Im proud of you. At least you have the mindset to quit smoking. Take your time aites. I'll support you! :D

A true friend is a person who is there for you through thick and thin. They don't judge you by the clothes you wear, or the size of your house. They love you no matter what. They are a shoulder to cry on, or a partner to laugh with. They stand by you in your times of need, and listen when you are excited. They know every little about you. They stand up for you when others don't. Best friends hang tough. They don't come with fragile stickers, and aren't easily scared off..or ticked off. Best friends help you out whenever they can, make time for you even when they don't have any, and trust your friendship enough to say 'no'. Best friends are...cross-your-heart-and-hope-to-die, good-times-and-bad-times, borrow-anything, tell-you-everything, trust-you-with-their-deepest-darkest-secrets, always-and-forever-friends.

Many people will walk in and out of your life, but only true friends will leave footprints in your heart.

NadiahD, just a little something for you to reflect on. As what I've said, whatever the outcomes may be, be strong. An ending in a friendship is not the end of everything. You still have a beginning to a new friendship. I hope you guys will be okay anytime soon. :D

A real boyfriend

2010-02-04T14:39:00.001+08:00

Don’t care if you have a boyfriend or girlfriend right now.

I don’t care if you are a guy or a woman .

Just read this, it will make a difference.

If only everyone could see this and understand it.

When she starts cursing at you trying to act all tough
Kiss her and tell her you love her

When she’s quiet
Ask her whats wrong

When she ignores you
Give her your attention

When she pulls away
Pull her back

When you see her at her worst
Tell her she’s beautiful

When you see her start crying
Just hold her and don’t say a word

When you see her walking
Sneak up and hug her waist from behind

When she’s scared
Protect her

When she steals your favorite hoodie
Let her keep it and sleep with it for a night

When she teases you
Tease her back and make her laugh

When she doesn’t answer for a long time
reassure her that everything is okay

When she looks at you with doubt
Back yourself up

When she says that she loves you
she really does more than you can understand

When she grabs at your hands
Hold her’s and play with her fingers

When she bumps into you;
bump into her back and make her laugh

When she tells you a secret
keep it safe and untold

When she looks at you in your eyes
dont look away until she does

When she says it’s over
she still wants you to be hers

When she reposts this bulletin
she wants you to read it

- Stay on the phone with her even if she’s not saying anything

- When she’s mad hug her tight and don’t let go

- When she says she’s ok don’t believe it, talk with her because 10 yrs later she’ll remember you

- Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her

-Treat her like she’s all that matters to you

- Stay up all night with her when she’s sick

- Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think it’s stupid

- Give her the world.

- Let her wear your clothes

-When she’s bored and sad, hang out with her

-Let her know she’s important.

- Don’t talk about other girls around her

- Kiss her in the pouring rain

- When she runs up to you crying, the first thing you say is:
“Whose ass am i kicking baby?”

Just being random.

...

2010-02-03T21:46:00.003+08:00

Its the last week of semester. Last week of school. Last week of being in year ones.

Monday, reached school on time but partialed by lunch.
Tuesday, I came in class on 2nd meeting and partialed by lunch.
Today, reached school on time but... BAHAHA. I never partial. Skip school terosssss.

Thursday and Friday how plak eh eh eh. :p

Nonono. Cannot partial, cannot skip school already. These two remaining days I wanna be a good girl, can? yeaaaaah I wanna listen to my baby's advice. bahaha. Izzah, please don't psycho me to partial again please. K I know Im the one who psycho-ed u yesterday. Heh! :p

To Nadhir Osman,

I've got two words for you
& that is I love you
You may ask why two when it's three
But you and I is counted as one, baby

♥♥♥

cherished moment.

2010-02-01T21:01:00.004+08:00

We used to share moments together
A friendship I thought that would last forever
Sometimes I wonder why we can't last
And why it just had to end so fast

Could it be me or could it be you
Oh really I don't have a clue
Me and you, it seemed so real and true
How I wished we could start anew

Our friendship may last just for a moment
But I'm glad I met you although it's only for a season
Neither you nor I wanted this to happen
But I guess we have to move on and learn

A person like you is hard to find
You're definitely one of a kind
Someone so sincere and so divine
A person I've always kept in mind

We may last nothing but a moment
But our memories last for a lifetime
We may last not long but only for a season

But I've always remembered you from time to time

I wrote this just meant for that one and only guy. A guy who I’ve always cherished since the day he plays a part in my life. Once a good friend of mine but now just a passerby.

2010-01-27T14:55:00.003+08:00

I am loving my job. I think. Now I feel so sayang to quit. ): And I heard that thomson is opening back some time around next month. That means I don't have to go out of home super early and take 2 bus. K I happy.

Secondly, Im very touched with Fatin's post. Like.. awwwwww, so very the shuweeeet! Yes, I remember my selengest moment in sec 1 k. Aiseyman, must you bring up my bittersweet past? Bahaha. But I still love you dear. And that picture you upload of me and him. Ahh, sugaryness la. I is meltings. HAHA. Insyaallah kite akan berkekalan jike tiade halangan. Amin. HAHA, cheyy3.

Class is being very horny today. -.- Started off with Adib! Gosh. What's with the dick on the webcam. Like a real life dick k Im not kidding. -.- And class is getting hyper webcamming with idon'tknow what country is it and they showing off their youknowwhat. Like ewww. -.-

I am sleepy. I wanna sleep. Nites. Bye.

Cinta setia

2010-01-25T11:31:00.000+08:00

Cinta itu tak bersyarat…
Cinta itu Tak Bersebab…

Ia Datang Dengan Tiba2 sahaja…

Aku Bukan Yang Maha Kuasa…

Aku Bukan Yang Maha Esa…

Untuk Menghalang Dan Menghilangkan Rasa Cinta…

Engkau Mungkin Boleh Lari Dari Cinta…

Engkau Mungkin Boleh Elak Rasa Cinta…

Tetapi Engkau Tidak boleh Elak Ataupun Lari Dari KehendakNya…

Tepuk dada dan tanya selera…

Seumurmu, tahukah sebab kamu bercinta?

Andai Kata Ada Sebabnya, Maka Itu Bukan Cinta…

Itu Hanya Kata Manis Untuk Yakinkan Kita…

Atau Hanya Strategi si sang percinta…

Aku Tahu Cinta Ini Tak Sentiasa Berakhir dengan kebahagian…

Kadangkala Dengan Kesedihan…

Kesedihan jugak Adat dalam percintaan

Seperti dalam satu Pertandingan…

Janganlah kita Kesal Dengan Satu kekalahan…

Mungkin itu satu dugaan…

Janganlah Kita Putus Asa dengan satu kegagalan…

Mungkin Itu satu Cobaan…

Cinta Perlukan Ketabahan…

Cinta Perlukan Kesabaran…

Berilah Peluang Pada Cinta…

Mungkin Itu Cinta Setia…

This is veh the sweet. Credits to Akeh. (:

For the sake of Nad

2010-01-23T23:13:00.002+08:00

I am so lazy to blog but for my syg's sake, I blog k. hees.

I really don't know what to blog because nothing to talk about. Let's talk about random things. :D

Today I went to work. Thought Im gonna be late, but no, I'm not! :D I expect to work with Emily but turns out Im working with this China girl. And she's new. -.- But luckily, Suresh came to the rescue! Happy liddat. Anyway, I had a great time laughing at workplace today. Thanks to the China girl. Well, the thing is whenever Suresh ask her a question, it took her a few minutes to analyse the question, ask the question back to Suresh and end up asking.."What is the question?". I tried my best to hold on my laughter but really, I can't. It is so damn hilarious uh. And its not like once or twice. Countless time. Tsktsk.

I find that Bedok is a place where you can find many different characters of people. And its not only me who realised that. In fact, the whole Icecube-ers realised it too! And I find that the most characters you can find there is the crazy ones. Like literally crazy. HAHA. Oops, sorry to the bedoks people! Just stating the fact here where me and the ice cube people has observed. Haha, K thats funny. If you guys don't believe me, try go Bedok library and stay there for one whole day. I bet you a million bucks you will find at least 3 crazy people. Ish3.

Ahhhhh, k Im stuck now. Oh, hello Nad! Enjoy reading this totally random post of mine? :D See, I type this just for you tau3. Sweet kan kite. Tk macam awak. Hehe. I love Nad super duperbly muchies la. :D Wahaha. K bye lovelees. Muacks!

(:

2010-01-21T22:54:00.004+08:00

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.

When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person.

When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They may seem like a godsend and they are. They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has come to share, grow or learn. They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it, it is real.

But only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons, things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.

Today, thank the person who in one way or another have been part of your life. Even if a small way you can make them feel that you are indeed thankful for their presence as well as the beautiful moments that they have given -

No matter if they are your reason, season, or your lifetime. (:

Now it got me wondering, he came into my life as what? As a reason or as a guy only for a season? But one thing I know for sure, he's never a lifetime. Hmm..

true much

2010-01-21T22:38:00.001+08:00

A guy had a crush on this girl, he follows her whenever she goes.

One day the girl noticed and asked the guy…

Girl: Why do you keep on following me???

Guy: Because you’re so pretty and I think I am falling for you.

Girl: Really? But you haven’t met my friend yet, she’s prettier than me and she’s at your back.

The guy turned his back but no one was there.

Guy: Are you making fun of me? Nobody’s there…

Girl: No, but if you really love me you won’t look back.

Nonsense

2010-01-21T22:07:00.002+08:00

I need someone to help me in math. Please help me. I've got a strong feelings that I'll have to retake this module. Oh man. Not math please.

And I guess Im back to the lazy old me. What a wrong timing. -.- I got the high instincts Im gonna get a second warning letter. Choy3, touch wood! Ut 3 dah nk dtg, dah start malas2 la plak. Ish3. Ape sia Dian.

K, my promise from today onwards. No more skipping schools or partial-ing or apape yang sewaktu dengannye. No matter how high the temptations is, I cannot skip school. Someone please remind me that. Secondly, I shall be attentive in class and DO SOME WORK. I know E36F, I've been useless for the past few months. Sorry yeah. :p Last but not least, I need to start preparing for Ut3. Like for real.

K, the promises is merepek maha merepekzzz. How many times have I promised that to myself and yet till now, I see no changes? Countless times. -.- Hmmmm, but I need to fulfill my last promise. No more reading off the 6ps and finished studying in 5 minutes. So not cool. If I did that for Ut1 and Ut2, and still get a good results (C and above excluding math), I wonder what I will get if I actually studied for real. Heh, kembang sekejap!

Back to math. SOMEONE TEACH ME MATH FROM THE SCRATCH PLEASE! pretty please. ):

...

2010-01-21T12:45:00.002+08:00

I don’t know if I still have that special feelings for him. I think of him often but I don’t know if I’m missing him. Seems like I went numb after those bitter-sweet memories that I had with him. Were moving on with our own lives, I could even sense that he's happy with someone else. I really don’t know if I’m jealous of her, I don’t know if I should be bothered by her existence. It’s just that I can’t bear seeing him with someone else. I don’t want to see him, nor hear him speak to me ever again.

I just want to live life by thinking that he exists in nowhere and that this is not real.

2010-01-20T13:25:00.003+08:00

Just something that I tried out for fun. Thanks to Nisa. Haha. Read that. Coolness shit or what.

If you're not the one.

2010-01-19T19:24:00.002+08:00

hey you,

2010-01-19T15:38:00.003+08:00